Recipe Archives - Page 9 of 9 - Perfection Pending

Perfection Pending

By Meredith Ethington

My Books
Motherhood
Kid Ideas
Mental Health
- Mental Health
- Anxiety
About

Main Courses Recipe Salad

Cilantro Black Bean Salad

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Welcome! I’m Meredith.

Mom. Writer. Diet Coke connoisseur. Born and raised Texan. Lover of real talk and laughter with a hint of sarcasm mixed in.

The Mother Load

Perfection Pending on Instagram

perfectpending

Mom • Author • Mental Health Therapist In Training
Grab my new book, The Mother Load, available now. 👇👇

Working on figuring out my mission as we speak. ❤️

Is anyone else like this? #dietcokeaddict #pebblei

Is anyone else like this? #dietcokeaddict #pebbleice #adhd #momlifebelike

Hello friends, it’s me. Meredith. Here are a f

Hello friends, it’s me. Meredith.

Here are a few things I’d tell you if I could call you all up:

❤️ It’s ok to say no to things.

❤️ Your kiddos don’t need perfection - they need real. Emotional, Messy, flawed, etc. It helps them know their emotions are valid.

❤️ Having anxiety or depression does not mean you’re an inadequate parent.

❤️ Never be ashamed of asking for help or going on medication if necessary.

❤️Kids can be draining. Take time for yourself. I promise you’ll be able to be a better, more present parent if you do this.

❤️ Boundaries are your friend. People that make you feel like you’re not enough are not.

Hang in there. It doesn’t get easier - like at all. But you get stronger.

I wrote this a few years ago. It helped me process

I wrote this a few years ago. It helped me process feelings of never measuring up and feeling lIke someone else would do it better than me.
I don’t feel like this very often anymore. But I know that there are plenty of mothers out there that do. You aren’t alone.
The experience of Motherhood is definitely something that humbles even the most confident mothers.
I wasn’t one to have much confidence once I began but I got there eventually.
If you’re in this headspace of wondering if you’re enough I’m here to tell you:
1. You are.
2. This is NORMAL.
3. This post is for you.
Read it on my substack now and consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. ❤️ It supports me as I hopefully support you.

I certainly didn’t. @a.mom.uncensored

I certainly didn’t. @a.mom.uncensored

I see nothing wrong here.

I see nothing wrong here.

Still not there yet. 😑 #ikea #momlifebelike #ik

Still not there yet. 😑 #ikea #momlifebelike #ikeahack #jokesfordays

This was my mom’s desk when she was little. At s

This was my mom’s desk when she was little. At some point it got passed down to one of her grandchildren. Then it made its way to my house and all three of my kids have used it too.
My middle decided he was done with it and I had no idea what to do with it. It’s almost an antique at this point and I knew my mom felt sentimental about it. It’s heavy and tiny but it has good bones as they say.
My mom lives too far away to come get it and the grandkids are all getting too big to want this desk in their rooms.
I walked around my little house looking for a spot for it. There really isn’t one.
Could it be an end table? Or swapped out for an entry table?
But then I walked into my bedroom and saw this bare wall. It’s not ideal. My husband will hate it. But I’ve been thinking that I needed a study spot in my house (in a room with a door that shuts and locks) since I’m in school again at 46 years old.
I’m hilariously too big for this little desk but also it seems just fine for sitting and writing papers.
The older I get, the more I realize that this life is short and I’m sure it will make my mom happy to know I’m not only hanging onto this desk a little while longer but it’s going to be used for actual school work again instead of hoarding useless scraps of paper, half filled notebooks and dull crayons no one has touched in years.
I’m breathing life back into this desk for a few more years and it seems symbolic of my taking something old (me) and using it for something new (becoming a therapist).
I’m not super sentimental about furniture but I’m sentimental about the people that I love.
She loves this desk so I guess I’ll love it a little longer on her behalf. ❤️

🚨Vulnerable post alert! My latest on substack:

🚨Vulnerable post alert! My latest on substack: "I feel depressed that it’s back, when I had been handling things so well.
I feel hopeless that although I know it will end, that it will come back again.
I feel embarrassed that I’m sometimes mean to the ones I love most.
I feel like I want to give up.
I feel tired.
I feel overwhelmed by the tiniest thing.
I feel alone. I feel like I’m literally the only one feeling that way in that moment even though I know I’m not deep down. But, anxiety makes me feel like that.
I feel like I just would be better off if I could disappear."

First day back after a week long vacay to the fun

First day back after a week long vacay to the fun of carpool and the reality of being a responsible adult is kicking my boot-ay. Can you tell? 😅

Yup. 😂 @themumcrew

Yup. 😂 @themumcrew

Best thrift find ever. 😂

Best thrift find ever. 😂

Mental health matters. ❤️

Mental health matters. ❤️

You get the full tour if you’re my friend.

You get the full tour if you’re my friend.

Because apparently it belongs to no one. 😑

Because apparently it belongs to no one. 😑

Just like building muscles in our body, to have go

Just like building muscles in our body, to have good mental health we need to build muscles in our brains as well. What does that look like?

For me, it often looks like practicing things that make me uncomfortable.
Saying no. Setting boundaries. Sitting in discomfort with feelings I don't like. Being OK if someone is mad at me. Learning to validate MYSELF. You get the idea.
But, really it can be anything that you need to work on but makes you feel REALLY uncomfortable. So much so that it feels like your brain is literally rejecting it. If you want to build that muscle in your brain that is OK with disappointing people in favor of your own mental health, you have to treat it like muscle building in your body.

1. Do it often enough.
2. Start small, and work your way up.
3. Go heavy when you're ready.

Practicing it often enough is really when you're going to get big results. Soon you'll get used to those negative feelings that come along with telling someone no and knowing they're disappointed. You'll build up endurance to tolerate the feelings and be able to sit with them and let them go. And finally, it will become second nature to you to do all those things you didn't think you could do. Just like strength training for a marathon - consider strength training for your mind.

One thing I'm working on is telling myself I'm OK. I struggle with seeking validation from others when really I need to be seeking validation from myself. Because MYSELF is good, worthy, and OK 99% of the time.

What are you practicing right now? I'd love to hear if this is true for you.

Love this so much. @nellie_scales

Love this so much. @nellie_scales

If you’ve loved anything I’ve written, conside

For the moms fighting all the battles no one sees.

Truth right here.

Truth right here.

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