Perfection Pending

By Meredith Ethington

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In the Motherhood

Days Like This

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You know that song….”Mama said they’ll be days like this”. Yep. Today was one of those days. All is quiet now, but I had a hairy morning that made me think, “If only all those people that wonder what stay at home Moms do all day could see me now”.

*Sigh*

We’ve been battling another little virus. And, a super annoying one. Annoying because no one is really acting that sick (which I am grateful for), but a tiny fever that makes me have to keep kids home from school. I hate that.

Well, Avery seemed well enough to go this morning, so here’s how my morning went.

7am-Husband leaves for work, and I am on getting daughter ready for school duty. Not an easy task for a non-morning person like her.

7:30am- Standing on the corner of my street in the snow with wet hair waiting for the other walking to school kids to come pick her up. Off she goes.

7:35-Rush around trying to feed breakfast to the boys and get them dressed to get ready for our 9:40 am doctor’s appointment (which I already forgot about and rescheduled once).

9:00- Getting close to being ready. Put baby in the crib with his bottle while I try to brush my own teeth, throw some make-up on, and put on a clean shirt.

9:05- Realize baby has had all he wants to drink and has miraculously figured out how to open his bottle and pour it all over his crib. Crap. I won’t be back until right before nap time. This means I have to wash his crib sheet and mattress cover before the doctor’s appointment. And, I still have to shovel some snow before I leave in 25 minutes.

9:10- Race around gathering up laundry. Throw it in and start it. Put 4 year old in charge of watching 1 year old while I quickly shovel the driveway a little so my crappy car does not get stuck in our driveway.

9:30- By sheer luck, we are actually on our way (in the snow) to the doctor’s appointment.

9:40-11:40- YES. TWO HOURS AT THE PEDIATRICIAN’S OFFICE!! Everyone that was there was sick. Including the front office staff!!! Coughing, sneezing, crusty noses. We were there for a well-visit. So, my skin starts to crawl thinking of all the germs. (Make a mental note to mention to the doctor that they should think about getting a sick kids waiting area. Then, forgot) Get the well visit done for 4 year old, shots for the baby, and we are back outside in the snow. That took WAY. TOO. LONG.

11:40- Get ambitious and decide to go to the post office and mail my complaint letter with photos to Southwest airlines. Check.

11:50- On my way home, trying to keep the baby awake in the backseat. He needs food, and so do I at this point.

12:00-Get inside, wash boys’ hands, get them seated at the table and check voicemail. Crap. The school has called and my daughter is not feeling good and wants to come home. WHY DIDN”T THEY CALL MY CELL!!??? I was just in the car with two kids.

12:05-Throw kids back in the car. Baby is NOT happy that his lunch is interrupted. Luckily the school is close. Go pick up smiling 6 year old from school. (Maybe I shouldn’t have said this morning that if she was still feeling bad to tell her teacher and she could come home).

1:00-Kids are fed, and asleep, and I wonder to myself, “What am I going to do for dinner since I never made it to the grocery store!!?”. Eat some chocolate to make myself happy.

And, that’s just what I did before lunch.

Here’s to dreaming of warmer weather.


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Comments

  1. TheAwakenedMomma says

    January 29, 2013 at 10:22 pm

    What a day! I hope writing it out helped you de-stress a little, I only have one kiddo and sometimes feel like I could lose my head, so kudos for keeping it together with three!

    Reply
  2. amberperea says

    January 29, 2013 at 10:24 pm

    I love when people ask me, “What do you DO all day?”. Um…everything (and then some). I remember the days when all I had to do was go to work then home and relax. My days are now from 7:30 AM until midnight..trade ya! 🙂

    Reply
  3. writermomangela says

    January 30, 2013 at 9:24 pm

    The name of yoru blog strikes a cord with me! Not pretending to be perfect is a recent goal in my life after a lifetime of being told to always show the world our perfect side only!

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      January 30, 2013 at 9:30 pm

      Mine too! Well, at least, I have tried to become more “real” with my blogging. I may still fake it a little in real life. 🙂 Thanks for following!

      Reply
      • writermomangela says

        January 31, 2013 at 7:40 am

        I’m working hard to let my kids see my imperfections. I want them to know I’m doing my best, but I know it’s not flawless and I don’t expect perfection from them either. 🙂 Thanks for the reply!

        Reply
  4. Michele Strobeck says

    January 31, 2013 at 11:59 am

    You know there are moments in life when you just know God/The Universe is trying to send you a message. Today, ad day when I could award myself with my “un-proudest-stay-at-home-mommy-moments-ever,” I discover your blog. Thank you for letting me feel like I am not alone in this most difficult, most isolating, but most wonderful job ever.

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      January 31, 2013 at 2:23 pm

      What a compliment!!! Thanks for reading!

      Reply

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Welcome! I’m Meredith.

Mom. Writer. Diet Coke connoisseur. Born and raised Texan. Lover of real talk and laughter with a hint of sarcasm mixed in.

The Mother Load

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Meredith Ethington

perfectpending

Mom • Author • Mental Health Therapist In Training
Grab my new book, The Mother Load, available now. 👇👇

Night night! 😤 Night night! 😤
If you missed my last post about how raising teens If you missed my last post about how raising teens can wreck you mentally….wellll this is part of the reason why. So lonely! But we are in this together somehow. 😂 Make sure to check out my latest substack and grab a copy of my book —- The Mother Load!
NEW ---> "When there are problems in these big kid NEW ---> "When there are problems in these big kid years, it’s no longer really acceptable to call a friend and air the annoyances of the situation. At least not the specifics.

Sure, you can commiserate with a fellow parent about teenagers being the worst.

But, to be honest - they’re not the worst. They’re kind of amazing. But their problems make me tired to my core." 

Read the latest on my substack. I promise you'll relate. ❤️
So sweet. ❤️ Follow me @perfectpending and bet So sweet. ❤️
Follow me @perfectpending and better yet buy my book or subscribe to my substack to support me.
"I don’t know about you, but I don’t really wa "I don’t know about you, but I don’t really want same-ness anymore. I want messy. I want admissions that shit is hard and we don’t have it all together. I want to have a makeup free, messy bun in my sweats run in with a mom friend and not feel worried she’s checking out my un-groomed eyebrows.

I don’t want to try to give off this illusion that I’m control of my life any better than the next person. It’s a shitshow for all of us, and we continue to hide it for fear of what? Being human?"

Read the rest on my Substack. Link in profile.
WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I MISS IT? What if I miss the best time of my life. What if it’s right this second?
What if it’s right now while I’m in finals week of grad school, and have a kid that’s sick? 
I already miss so much. The gummy smiles of babes without any teeth. The squeaky voices of 2 year olds. The babbling of a baby that’s just trying so hard to say mama. The grammar mistakes my kids make when they’re talking that I don’t have the heart to correct because I love it too much. 

I miss a lot about those younger years that have already slipped away. My youngest is sick, much like in this picture, but he is too big to snuggle in my arms now when he’s running a fever. 

Today I had the thought, what if this is it? What if this IS the happiest I’ll ever be?
For a moment, I lingered in that thought as I stood over my sink and did the dishes. I started to cry.
Am I missing it? AM I? I felt a tug that maybe I was. Maybe I wasn’t relishing enough, and enjoying enough, and being present enough.
But, then I realized, it will never be ENOUGH. 

Read the rest in my substack ❤️
New year, same me. 😂 #mentalhealth #anxiety #de New year, same me. 😂
#mentalhealth #anxiety #depression
"I don't care" as I literally care about every sin "I don't care" as I literally care about every single thing.
I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of th I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of this. *sweeps arm generally at planet earth*

Look, I’ve never been a half glass full kind of gal. I can ALWAYS find the negative in every situation. 

But, right now it’s easy to say that I’m over it. It being.....

The state of our economy. Social media. People being unemployed. People being racist and homophobic. The debate over politics. People judging people. ALLLLLL of it. 

Everything is crap right now. We joke about it a lot. We have to in order to survive. 

It’s the one millionth day of January but Spring feels so far away. 

I’m over these four damn walls that we call home. 

Yeah, I know. Even as I’m typing this it all sounds like a bunch of ungrateful whiney BS. I hear it. I don’t need you to point it out, Karen. 

But, my guess is you’re reading this right now and realizing you’re over it too. Whatever “it” is in your life.

Some days the world feels like total crap. Everything is a mess. Everything costs too much. For E-V-E-R-Y-B-O-D-Y. 

Yes, even for you Karen. ➡️➡️ to keep reading.
Yes. Boundaries are healthy and good. And they mea Yes. Boundaries are healthy and good. And they mean someone loves you that much to communicate them! Love this wisdom from @wittyidiot
NEW POST ----> "This is not a post about loss of a NEW POST ----> "This is not a post about loss of a loved one. Or loss of a child. Those things are real, and they’re heart wrenching. And, this post is certainly not to compare that loss with the one I’m going to talk about.

But, the loss of yourself in motherhood is real. And It’s not talked about enough." 

Do you feel like you lost yourself in motherhood? How? I really want to know. 

Psss - I am in grad school to become a therapist, and am not ashamed to ask that you subscribe to my paid substack. I just lowered the cost to $36/year! That's like $4/month and you'll have access to all my previous posts, and some new weekly short posts to give you ideas to help with balancing motherhood and your own mental health. I'm learning a lot in school, and will only continue to do so, so subscribe and we'll support each other. ❤️
This memory made me laugh this morning. 🤣 This memory made me laugh this morning. 🤣
Saaaame. @womenwhorunwiththemoon Saaaame. @womenwhorunwiththemoon
I’m sorry are you really wearing doc martens and I’m sorry are you really wearing doc martens and a dress with spaghetti straps and a Tshirt under it while you’re telling me I’m doing it wrong? 🤣 Life is wild. Teenagers are fun.
Found in my pediatricians office. 🤣 What’s th Found in my pediatricians office. 🤣 What’s the moral of the story friends? If you think your household is always sick - it’s because they probably are. Kids make everything more germ-y
Here’s what I do know 👇 No one knows what th Here’s what I do know 👇

No one knows what they’re doing. 
We all feel like imposters. 
Our kids love us anyway. 
We’re all going to be OK. 
You’ve got this (as much as any of us do) 😘

#momspiration #momlife #funnymoms #memtalhealth #parentinglife #parentingquotes
"By trying to be perfect, we're actually trying to "By trying to be perfect, we're actually trying to avoid being human." 

Do you struggle with perfectionism? Parenthood has helped me quite a bit, but It's something I've battled my whole life. I still struggle occasionally, although it's gotten better. But, let's stop trying to avoid being human and instead embrace ourselves an in turn embrace the entire human race. ❤️ I'd love to hear how you embrace being imperfect. 

#perfecționism #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #anxiety #imperfect #perfectpending #themotherload #thementalload
Mood. Mood.
Some of you wanted sources on my last reel where I Some of you wanted sources on my last reel where I said we only need to be getting it right 30% of the time for our kids to have secure attachments. Well I wrote a bit more about the concept of being the “good enough mother” a term coined in the 50’s by a researcher and pediatrician. Check it all out in my newest post. Link in profile.
It’s true! Researchers have found that as long a It’s true! Researchers have found that as long as you’re doing the repair after mistakes the other times - then 30% is enough! Sometimes I worry I’m not doing it right but I definitely know I’m doing it right 30% of the time! 
Probably a whole lot more to be honest. I bet you are too. #momlife #encouragement #momspiration
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