Perfection Pending

By Meredith Ethington

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Mom Life: Perfection Pending – The Book

Cover of book, mom life perfection pending
Out-parented at PTA? Out-liked on social media? Wondering how your best friend from high school’s kids are always color-coordinated, angelic, and beaming from every photo, while your kids look more like feral monkeys? It’s okay. Imperfection is the new perfection! Join Meredith Ethington, “one of the funniest parents on Facebook,” according to Today.com, as she relates encouraging stories of real-mom life in her debut parenting humor book, Mom Life: Perfection Pending.
 
 
Whether you’re buried in piles of laundry, packing your 50th sack lunch for the week, or almost making it out the door in time for school, you’ll laugh along with stories of what real-mom life is like–and realize that sometimes simply making it through the day is good enough. An uplifting yet real look at all that is expected of moms in the 21st century, Mom Life: Perfection Pending is so relatable you’ll find yourself saying, “I guess I’m doing okay after all.”

Where to Buy Mom Life: Perfection Pending:

Deseret Book

 Amazon (affiliate link)

Barnes & Noble

iTunes

Kobo.com 

What others are saying about Mom Life: Perfection Pending

“Ethington has a knack for weaving just the right amount of humor and heartfelt honesty into every page. She provides moms a healthy dose of parenting reality, while encouraging them to be confident in taking on the hardest job on earth—being a mother.” – Jill Smokler,New York Times bestselling author and founder of Scary Mommy

“Meredith is no stranger to the perils and woes of parenting. She does a fantastic job at being real and honest. I think we are all … perfection pending.” – Meredith Masony, author, speaker, comic, and founder of That’s Inappropriate

“Ethington’s heartfelt, humorous take on motherhood offers overworked and touched-out mamas exactly the right dose of ‘Don’t worry, you’re doing all right’ we didn’t even know we needed. I saw myself in these pages, and if you’re a mom, you probably will, too.” – Kristen Mae, bestselling author of Beyond the Break and Red Water

“This book has a chapter titled, ‘I Never Knew You Could Ruin Someone’s Day by Simply Keeping Them from Killing Themselves.’ If that doesn’t make you want to buy it, then we can’t be friends.” – Clint Edwards, author of No Idea What I’m Doing: A Daddy Blogand “I’m Sorry” – Your Husband

“A delightful, identifiable, and entertaining read from cover to cover, “Mom Life: Perfection Pending” is an extraordinary and highly recommended addition to community library Parenting collections.”
– Midwest Book Review
 

From the Author

“I wrote this book because I wanted the mother that felt isolated, and alone and like she wasn’t measuring up to know that she, too was meant to be a mother. And, she is in fact the best mother for her own kids. And, I wanted to do it in a humorous way that would be relatable. But, most of all I wanted to encourage the mom that is out there struggling with feelings of inadequacy and not measuring up, by saying – me too. We’re strong and we can do this. Because we love our kids.

As I’ve been writing through my own motherhood experience over the years, I noticed something really important. I noticed that moms wanted to talk about the hard stuff. They wanted to talk about how they would sit in their closets and cry over a parenting challenge. They wanted to hear that someone else gets angry and loses her temper sometimes and regrets it.

They want to know about the mom that struggles with PPD or anxiety. Moms have thanked me for being honest and open with a sense of humor. But, the important thing I’ve come to realize through my writing is that moms also need to know they can do it. They are enough. And there is no measuring stick for motherhood. Yes, they want to hear that others struggle too, but they want to know that it is understood by other women that you can simultaneous love your kids, love motherhood and all it entails, AND be honest about it.”

 

About Meredith Ethington

Meredith Ethington is a mom of three and the writer and creator of the popular parenting blog, Perfection Pending. She is a born-and-raised Texan who loves real talk and laughter, mixed with a little bit of sarcasm. Meredith earned her degree in Psychology and then began writing in 2007 as a way to document her life as a new mom. She quickly realized she had a passion for writing, which helped her work out a lot of her feelings about being a mom. She writes mostly to commiserate with other parents and to remind herself that she doesn’t want to be a perfect mother—she wants to be a real one. Meredith has her work featured often in publications such as Scary Mommy, Momtastic, Babble, The Huffington Post, Parents Magazine, and CafeMom. In 2017, BlogHer named Meredith a Voices of The Year Honoree. She has been featured many times by Today.com as one of the funniest parents to follow on Facebook and has appeared in the Wall Street Journal and New York Magazine. Meredith now lives in Salt Lake City, Utah, with her husband, three kids, and a very moody cat.

MEDIA:

On Good Things Utah – March 22nd, 2018

In The Tyler Morning Telegraph (Tyler, TX)

In The Deseret News (Salt Lake City Paper)

Another appearance on Good Things Utah, July 16, 2018

Welcome! I’m Meredith.

Mom. Writer. Diet Coke connoisseur. Born and raised Texan. Lover of real talk and laughter with a hint of sarcasm mixed in.

The Mother Load

Perfection Pending on Instagram

perfectpending

Mom • Author • Mental Health Therapist In Training
Grab my new book, The Mother Load, available now. 👇👇

Meredith Ethington
SAME. @notfolu SAME. @notfolu
I feel like I’m failing. And today it was over I feel like I’m failing. 
And today it was over a loaf of bread. Freaking bread, man. 
My daughter came home from school for lunch and wanted a grilled cheese but we were out of bread. 
I knew we were out of bread and I thought I got bread in my grocery order last night but apparently I didn’t. 
This resulted in a short grumpy exchange where she stormed out and we both later apologized over text. 
Me for failing at having bread. 
Her for overreacting. 
I used to be so on top of meal planning and prep and keeping everyone’s favorite things stocked. 
Now I’m failing at it. 
I knew when I went back to school balls would be dropped. And apparently keeping track of the food is where I’m failing. I know I’m not failing at everything (my GPA is amazing) but failure still sucks when you’re used to doing something competently but your brain or body or whatever can no longer do it all. You’ve reached max capacity. 
They aren’t going to starve by any means and teenagers can go get their own bread. I know I know. 
But it’s always been my job. And now I just can’t do it the way I used to. 
It symbolizes the way all women inevitably fail when one. More. Thing. Gets added to our plates. 
The mental load is too much from the moment we become the wives and the moms. Honestly adulting feels hard these days in general. For my husband too. We frequently feel like we’re drowning in responsibility and tasks. 
A loaf of bread makes me feel like a failure. 
WHY does anyone sign up for this? 😅 
Anyway - maybe you’re not crazy enough to go back to school like me but one more thing still got added to your adulting plate and you know you will fail in one area or another. 
You will. 
It may not be the loaf bread like me but something will get dropped or forgotten. Mistakes WILL be made. 
The mental load is heavy. 
Let’s normalize failure ok? 
Not in all areas but in some when the load gets too heavy. 
Because this mama needs that reassurance right now. Maybe you do too.
😂💀 @nora.dominick 😂💀 @nora.dominick
My latest. ❤️ Link in profile. My latest. ❤️ Link in profile.
Working on figuring out my mission as we speak. ❤️
Is anyone else like this? #dietcokeaddict #pebblei Is anyone else like this? #dietcokeaddict #pebbleice #adhd #momlifebelike
Hello friends, it’s me. Meredith. Here are a f Hello friends, it’s me. Meredith. 

Here are a few things I’d tell you if I could call you all up: 

❤️ It’s ok to say no to things.

❤️ Your kiddos don’t need perfection - they need real. Emotional, Messy, flawed, etc. It helps them know their emotions are valid. 

❤️ Having anxiety or depression does not mean you’re an inadequate parent. 

❤️ Never be ashamed of asking for help or going on medication if necessary. 

❤️Kids can be draining. Take time for yourself. I promise you’ll be able to be a better, more present parent if you do this. 

❤️ Boundaries are your friend. People that make you feel like you’re not enough are not. 

Hang in there. It doesn’t get easier - like at all. But you get stronger.
I wrote this a few years ago. It helped me process I wrote this a few years ago. It helped me process feelings of never measuring up and feeling lIke someone else would do it better than me. 
I don’t feel like this very often anymore. But I know that there are plenty of mothers out there that do. You aren’t alone. 
The experience of Motherhood is definitely something that humbles even the most confident mothers. 
I wasn’t one to have much confidence once I began but I got there eventually. 
If you’re in this headspace of wondering if you’re enough I’m here to tell you:
1. You are. 
2. This is NORMAL. 
3. This post is for you. 
Read it on my substack now and consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. ❤️ It supports me as I hopefully support you.
I certainly didn’t. @a.mom.uncensored I certainly didn’t. @a.mom.uncensored
I see nothing wrong here. I see nothing wrong here.
Still not there yet. 😑 #ikea #momlifebelike #ik Still not there yet. 😑 #ikea #momlifebelike #ikeahack #jokesfordays
This was my mom’s desk when she was little. At s This was my mom’s desk when she was little. At some point it got passed down to one of her grandchildren. Then it made its way to my house and all three of my kids have used it too. 
My middle decided he was done with it and I had no idea what to do with it. It’s almost an antique at this point and I knew my mom felt sentimental about it. It’s heavy and tiny but it has good bones as they say. 
My mom lives too far away to come get it and the grandkids are all getting too big to want this desk in their rooms. 
I walked around my little house looking for a spot for it. There really isn’t one. 
Could it be an end table? Or swapped out for an entry table? 
But then I walked into my bedroom and saw this bare wall. It’s not ideal. My husband will hate it. But I’ve been thinking that I needed a study spot in my house (in a room with a door that shuts and locks) since I’m in school again at 46 years old. 
I’m hilariously too big for this little desk but also it seems just fine for sitting and writing papers. 
The older I get, the more I realize that this life is short and I’m sure it will make my mom happy to know I’m not only hanging onto this desk a little while longer but it’s going to be used for actual school work again instead of hoarding useless scraps of paper, half filled notebooks and dull crayons no one has touched in years. 
I’m breathing life back into this desk for a few more years and it seems symbolic of my taking something old (me) and using it for something new (becoming a therapist). 
I’m not super sentimental about furniture but I’m sentimental about the people that I love. 
She loves this desk so I guess I’ll love it a little longer on her behalf. ❤️
🚨Vulnerable post alert! My latest on substack: 🚨Vulnerable post alert! My latest on substack: "I feel depressed that it’s back, when I had been handling things so well.
I feel hopeless that although I know it will end, that it will come back again.
I feel embarrassed that I’m sometimes mean to the ones I love most.
I feel like I want to give up.
I feel tired.
I feel overwhelmed by the tiniest thing.
I feel alone. I feel like I’m literally the only one feeling that way in that moment even though I know I’m not deep down. But, anxiety makes me feel like that.
I feel like I just would be better off if I could disappear."
First day back after a week long vacay to the fun First day back after a week long vacay to the fun of carpool and the reality of being a responsible adult is kicking my boot-ay. Can you tell? 😅
Yup. 😂 @themumcrew Yup. 😂 @themumcrew
Best thrift find ever. 😂 Best thrift find ever. 😂
Mental health matters. ❤️ Mental health matters. ❤️
You get the full tour if you’re my friend. You get the full tour if you’re my friend.
Because apparently it belongs to no one. 😑 Because apparently it belongs to no one. 😑
Just like building muscles in our body, to have go Just like building muscles in our body, to have good mental health we need to build muscles in our brains as well. What does that look like? 

For me, it often looks like practicing things that make me uncomfortable. 
Saying no. Setting boundaries. Sitting in discomfort with feelings I don't like. Being OK if someone is mad at me. Learning to validate MYSELF. You get the idea. 
But, really it can be anything that you need to work on but makes you feel REALLY uncomfortable. So much so that it feels like your brain is literally rejecting it. If you want to build that muscle in your brain that is OK with disappointing people in favor of your own mental health, you have to treat it like muscle building in your body. 

1. Do it often enough. 
2. Start small, and work your way up. 
3. Go heavy when you're ready. 

Practicing it often enough is really when you're going to get big results. Soon you'll get used to those negative feelings that come along with telling someone no and knowing they're disappointed. You'll build up endurance to tolerate the feelings and be able to sit with them and let them go. And finally, it will become second nature to you to do all those things you didn't think you could do. Just like strength training for a marathon - consider strength training for your mind. 

One thing I'm working on is telling myself I'm OK. I struggle with seeking validation from others when really I need to be seeking validation from myself. Because MYSELF is good, worthy, and OK 99% of the time. 

What are you practicing right now? I'd love to hear if this is true for you.
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