It never fails that when I see a mom pour her soul into a post on the internet (or just hint that it’s hard), the comments section gets “lit” with opinions. Perhaps the mom is just looking for solidarity, venting, or just having an off day, people. Calm down.
It doesn’t matter really though. The much smarter people of the interwebs have OPINIONS, I tell you. Like a lot of them.
And sadly, they are usually from other women (who are obviously doing it better than you) or single white men who don’t have kids. Ahem.
Here are 21 reasons women should never complain about motherhood:
“At least you have kids”
“Other women would kill to have what you have.”
“You knew what you were getting into.”
“You chose this.’“
“Try working full time and having kids.”
“Try being a single parent.”
“Try having a kid with special needs.”
“You only have one? Try having three…or four…or five…”
“Try having a disabled child.”
Try having dectuplets! Just kidding, that one has probably never been said.
Complaining about motherhood means you’re selfish.
Your religion or culture says motherhood should be all you need to be happy and fulfilled.
“But, I LoVE bEinG a MOm!” (Implying you obviously do NOT).
Complaining about motherhood means you’re a negative person.
“You’re a stay at home mom, so you have it easy. Must be nice.”
“Dads too.” (eyeroll – because of course).
“But, motherhood is a gift!”
Complaining about motherhood means you don’t love your children.
“You made your bed, now you can lie in it.”
“Suck it up! Quit playing the victim.”
“What? Like it’s hard?”
Complaining about motherhood isn’t usually complaining though.
It’s usually a tired, worn-out mama who just needs some encouragement (not the toxic positivity kind) or some validation. She probably needs a hot meal, a shower, and a nap too to be honest.
These comments from the Doing It Better Mothers of the Internet are so tired.
But, I guess as long as there are mothers, there will be other mothers (and single white men with no children) telling us we should stop complaining. (Yawn).
Empathy, my friends. Look it up.
This short video by Brene Brown is a great start.
Did I leave a reason out? If I did, let me know in the comments below. Hugs, mamas. You’re doing a GOOD job.
Don’t forget to grab my book, The Mother Load if you like conversations like these about motherhood, the mental load, and mental health. And if you’re sick of hearing the narrative that mothers should never complain. Also – will you subscribe below?