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Chandler In the Motherhood

I Hate Feeding My Kids

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This is not a good statement to make for several reasons. Please don’t call child protective services. I promise. I do feed them.

But, I really do hate feeding my kids. It’s not that I’m negligent, or that I’m a bad Mom, or that they are malnourished, it’s just that feeding them really does annoy the heck out of me. It has been this way since day one. I never have really enjoyed the feeding process. And, now that I have 3 kids, I feel like a dang waitress in my own home. A job that while I enjoyed very much when I actually got paid to do it while in college, I now abhor when I have to do it with my 3 kids.

The whole process of meals, and snacks. Packing lunches. Coming up with WHAT to eat. Preparing them and cleaning them up is enough to make we want to scream. I know Moms that like feeding their children and the even crazier mom that enjoys packing the lunches (you know who you are). But, honestly, I find it downright annoying.

Here’s a typical meal time in real time:

“Hey kids! Time for breakfast/lunch or dinner…wash your hands!”

I hear little feet scurrying and I try to put a plate down of something for each kid so that they can start feeding themselves the minute they sit down. But,  it never fails. I am in mid stride to go get their drinks and I hear, “Mommy I’m thirsty” three times before I even reach the glasses. I am walking over to set down the drinks and I hear, “Mommy! I said I wanted pears with my sandwich”. I sigh, walk over to get the pears that I just hadn’t had a chance to put on the table yet. “Mommy, I didn’t want cheese on mine!” as I round the corner to grab the…. “Mommy! I want salt!” Yep, you guessed it: salt. You get the idea right? I am still waiting tables. I just don’t get tips now.

But, feeding my kids is a HUGE part of my job. I mean, nourishing my kids is one of my primary responsibilities. And let’s not even mention how many times I hear, “I don’t like this” while gagging ensues because I dared to add (insert some sort of nutritious food) to the meal. I now understand while I was somewhere around middle school age my Mom declared she was done with cooking, and she never really did again. My Dad was the primary cook in our house from then on. And why? Because we were ungrateful little monsters is my guess.

I love this note that my daughter wrote the other day. Not sure what her point was, but I get the point loud and clear. And, it makes me laugh like crazy:

Image

Yep. Looks about right for a Saturday morning. Notice I am up at 8:01. Heh. And, guess what I’m probably doing at that time? Feeding my kids.

And, don’t even get me started on the 4 year old who literally has 3 breakfasts everyday. He wants to eat first. Then, sees his sister eating and wants some of that too. And, then when mommy and daddy want to eat, yeah he needs a little of that also. He has an uncanny ability to hear you opening some food packaging from 3 rooms away. I do not lie.

And, we can’t forget the baby! He is so freaking adorable that it kills me. But, at the same time, the frustrations with feeding a baby that desperately needs to eat every calorie he can get his hands on because of his food allergies, yet has such a small amount of food he will actually eat has problems all its own. Not to mention the way he has become a control freak when it comes to feeding time.*

I don’t know what the answer is. Yes I do. It is to win the lottery and hire a cook/waitress immediately.  Too bad the lottery is illegal in Utah. But, you better believe when they are old enough to get a job, I will be expecting tips.

*The following is an article I wrote today over at my little blogging job at Families.com. I am copying it here for memory’s sake so that when I am old and feeble or maybe when I have a momentary lapse in judgment about wanting another baby, I can read this. 🙂 Here is the link to the original article

My baby has decided that feeding time is all about control. Oh how I love/hate this stage. Parenting a baby that is transitioning into toddlerhood is fun, exciting, and takes a lot of patience.

For example, I recently had noticed that my little guy had started to refuse some of the foods he normally loves. He would turn his head away from the first bite, or arch his back and shake his head no. I couldn’t figure out what was causing the problem until one day when I handed him the spoon. He was thrilled.

Since then, he has desired more and more control over his spoon, his bowl, and everything else that goes into his mouth. For a while, I was able to get away with just letting him hold a spoon while I simultaneously fed him with another spoon. He would dip his spoon in whatever I was feeding him, and that would distract him enough that he would open his mouth for bites when I would try to feed him something.

But, now, it has just turned into a messy, gooey mess at every meal. Because having his own spoon is no longer enough. Now he wants to have complete control over everything. He wants to not only hold the spoon, have the bowl on his tray and dip into it, but he wants to be solely responsible for getting the food into his mouth.

I’ve given up trying to feed him myself. Now, it is up to him to get the food into his mouth.

Don’t get me wrong, he has plenty of finger foods. And, he enjoys those, but he won’t even eat his finger foods without a fork in his hands now. I’d like to say it is cute (because it often is), but it can also be very frustrating and messy.

Motherhood to a baby is all about letting go. One day they do have to become toddlers, big kids, and so on. I just didn’t think it was going to happen this soon. I mean, the kid isn’t even walking yet.


19 Comments

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Comments

  1. Rayna Drago says

    February 8, 2013 at 2:50 pm

    I just so enjoy what and how you write. You are awesome! Thanks for the laughs!!

    Reply
  2. drandrearyan says

    February 8, 2013 at 4:11 pm

    Awesome (from the mom of 3 kids who posted the cartoon you love!).

    Reply
  3. monk-monk says

    February 8, 2013 at 5:43 pm

    I have a hard enough time feeding myself, that now being responsible for feeding another being is a real trip! Ideally I would eat like a college frat-boy. One time Boof came home, and, for dinner I was eating tostitos with melted cheese (nachos, but with nothing on them, just the cheese) and a klondike bar. Oh, and a beer. Kid you not.

    I also tend to wait until I’m starving to start cooking (or even thinking about food) and the whole process seems so daunting that I result to noodles with marinara sauce EVERY single night.

    So glad to know I’m not the only one

    Reply
  4. MJ says

    February 9, 2013 at 9:01 am

    lol Your baby is adorable.

    My toddler has now decided she won’t take food from anyone but me. So Daddy, sister, and brother can no longer even touch her food when I used to get help from them. *sigh*

    Just to give you a head’s up, you will run into a whole other list of other annoyances when your kids become teens. I have two of them. 🙂

    Reply
  5. whatimeant2say says

    February 9, 2013 at 12:30 pm

    Well, this is funny! I just wrote about somewhat the same topic! I bet a whole lot of moms feel this way!

    Reply
  6. Melissa says

    February 10, 2013 at 4:26 pm

    I’m loving your blog! I just jumped over here after you commented on my indoor photos post at Doe A Deery, and it’s so fun to read posts from such an authentic person! I love how real you are (LOVED your About Me page), and love your blog. I’m excited to read more! Thanks so much for your comments, I love feedback. Feel free to email me for photography questions anytime, and I’m so happy I found your blog! I’ll be following it 🙂

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      February 10, 2013 at 5:17 pm

      Thanks Melissa! I’m loving your blog too! Catherine Ethington is one of my cousin/step sister in law relatives. I’ll let her explain that one. 😉 So, that is how I found out about your blog. You guys are doing a great job so far. Can’t wait to see more. And, if you ever need a guest blogger that writes about her three crazy kids…or whatever, feel free to ask!

      Reply
  7. Nicola says

    February 26, 2013 at 5:04 pm

    Love it! I feel EXACTLY the same. Feeding time at the zoo. I’m too tired to eat by the end of it.

    Reply
  8. kelloggs77 says

    February 27, 2013 at 10:29 am

    Amen sista! Great post.

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      February 27, 2013 at 11:07 am

      Thank you!! 🙂

      Reply
  9. ParentingIsFunny says

    March 1, 2013 at 9:57 pm

    I do too. It’s the low point of the day. Bedtime would be worse if it weren’t for the promise of the kids going to sleep afterward. 😉

    Reply
  10. twinzees says

    March 8, 2013 at 6:34 pm

    I am late to the party for this but this is too funny! I was complaining to my mother about how it always feels like its time to eat. I am constantly in the kitchen and it’s not even for me. What they like today, they hate tomorrow and most food is thrown at me anyway! Love your blog!

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 8, 2013 at 6:36 pm

      Ha! I can’t even imagine with twins!!

      Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 8, 2013 at 6:37 pm

      And I hope you stick around!

      Reply

Trackbacks

  1. I Feel Robbed | Faking Picture Perfect says:
    March 11, 2013 at 2:28 pm

    […] FEEDING. Every parent can relate to how annoying feeding your kids can be. That’s not what I’m talking about here. But, what if your kid is being extra picky and […]

    Reply
  2. Through Small and Simple Things | Faking Picture Perfect says:
    May 20, 2013 at 3:45 pm

    […] I’m still working hard at doing it. And, while I don’t necessarily love the chore of feeding my kids, it is part of this job. And, it may not seem like it is that rewarding, but in truth, it is part […]

    Reply
  3. I Discovered the Key to Feeding my Toddler. | Faking Picture Perfect says:
    October 2, 2013 at 2:40 pm

    […] Feeding my kids has never been my favorite chore parental responsibility.  And, with every child, there has been a challenge of some sort in the eating department. […]

    Reply
  4. Birthday Realities when You’re a Parent | Perfection Pending says:
    February 5, 2014 at 10:56 am

    […] lunch at home with the tiny rascals that demand something every second while you try to shove food in your […]

    Reply
  5. 5 Tricks to Feeding Picky Toddlers | Perfection Pending says:
    September 11, 2014 at 5:01 am

    […] I often teeter somewhere between not caring if the picky two year old eats, and desperately trying to get him to. If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ll probably roll your eyes that I am blogging about how I hate feeding my kids. […]

    Reply

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Welcome! I’m Meredith.

Mom. Writer. Diet Coke connoisseur. Born and raised Texan. Lover of real talk and laughter with a hint of sarcasm mixed in.

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