Perfection Pending

By Meredith Ethington

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Avery In the Motherhood Kyle

Organization. It’s All About The Multi-Colored Baskets. Truly.

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Wow. I finally got my kids’ room organized. Since Avery and Kyle share, it’s so hard to find toys that all match perfectly to my multi-colored baskets. I also just decided that my kids don’t need to learn letters M-Z. Who needs them anyway? It just didn’t center perfectly above the bookshelf that housed only the toys that were just the right size. I especially love how I matched the books’ binder colors to each other and they just so happen to match the baskets too. Can you believe it? I mean, what are the odds that my books would match my baskets!!??

And, I just decided to throw out all the hideous mounds of stuffed animals they own. I just kept the ones that matched. I mean, they don’t play with them, so why keep them? They just don’t go with the baskets. And, believe me people, it’s all about the baskets. Who needs toys they really love? I mean, the giant glasses on top that they never play with just went so well. So, I had to keep those. Who needs the ratty old, smelly, stained stuffed animal my 6 year old has slept with every night since she was 4 months old? Giant green glasses are much more essential. Because, ya know. They match the baskets!

Just kidding.

My kids’ room really looks like this as of right now:

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Doesn’t it make you just want to hang out in there all day long? I mean, that room just screams, “Let’s all get down on floor together and do a puzzle!” Doesn’t it? It really is no wonder that they drag all their toys to the living room floor to play. Which at this moment has ritz cracker crumbs ground into the carpet by my precious15 month old. He wanted to do that to show mommy he was mad at her for taking a shower today.

This is the life folks. The life of a stay at home Mom. Not that first picture. That first picture which I found on FB, but is probably courtesy of pinterest (because isn’t that where all the ridiculous, unrealistic crap comes from?) And, I guarantee that is no real playroom. That’s from a freaking pottery barn kids catalog.*

I am not really mad about the picture. Someone somewhere has to sell overpriced kid’s furniture, right? What I’m mad about is that I feel like I need to live up to that. I’m ticked that when my kid’s room has looked that clean and organized that it’s usually because I cleaned it up. Then, I don’t allow them to play in there for at least a day week. They don’t mind. They have enough crap in various other parts of the house to play with.

Do you ever feel like you’re drowning in toys and losing the battle with “chores”?

My kids are 6, 4, and 1. So, we are still learning around here. But, we are trying to teach them about how to clean up after themselves. I promise. Don’t take that real picture of mine as evidence I’m a liar. Because, all it takes is one 4 year old “looking for something” to do that in about 5 minutes. So, why organize? Why clean up at all??

One thing I’ve been trying to tell my kids after they I clean their room is that it just feels better. Isn’t it true that as soon as a place looks amazingly clean then they want to play there again? My kids get this. They understand that if it’s messy, then they don’t feel good in that space. They don’t feel like playing there. But, does it make a difference? Not really.

I’m looking for some fabulous tricks to getting your kids to clean their rooms? How do you teach a 6 and 4 year old to respect their own space? Really. I’d like to know.

And about 20 minutes after I wrote the above words I heard this conversation:

A: Let’s go play barbies!
K: ok!
A: Oh. I thought our room was clean. (Disappointed)
Me: what did you say?
A: never mind.
Me: you aren’t in trouble Avery, I just want to know what you said.
A: (in a slightly mumbled tone) I just said I thought our room was clean so we could go play barbies.
Me: ( me smiling while she tries to pretend she doesn’t know why I’m smiling) how do you think you can fix that problem?
K: (proudly) clean it!

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*And PS-I looked for this image after I wrote this post to find out where it was from, and have to give credit where credit is due. It is from a website selling multi-colored baskets. Perfect. and I’m proud to report they are cleaning their room as we speak.


33 Comments

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Comments

  1. donofalltrades says

    March 8, 2013 at 2:26 pm

    My wife makes the kids clean up their crap, but we’re in a fairly new house and have conceded the dining room to them as a play room…sigh. This new house is much larger than our old house, yet we still seem to not have enough room for all the stuff!

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 8, 2013 at 2:27 pm

      Well, I make my kids clean up too if I have 2 hours to stand over them and practically move their hands for them. :/

      Reply
      • donofalltrades says

        March 8, 2013 at 2:30 pm

        I have to admit that I almost unfollowed you in a fit of rage, but that first pick wasn’t from your home. Well played.

        Reply
  2. Rayna Drago says

    March 8, 2013 at 2:29 pm

    LOL!! This is sooo why I do not belong to Pintrest. I mean c’mon!!! The crap people post is so unrealistic! If a mother has time to do the things that is on there then they just have WAY too much time on their hands!! And don’t ask me for advice on how to teach kids how to clean up…what they are learning is mom will clean it up. Very bad. But I HATE clutter and disorganization…a genetic trait on my father’s side I inherited. Maybe someday they will see they have the trait too. I can dream. 🙂

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 8, 2013 at 2:32 pm

      haha! Well, like I said on another comment. They clean it up if I have 2 hours to stand over them telling them exactly what to do and where to put everything!

      Reply
  3. nonGMOjournal says

    March 8, 2013 at 2:40 pm

    I just want you to know I love reading your posts. You have a gift for writing! I love your honesty and it makes me feel like I am not alone 🙂 Thanks!!

    Reply
  4. mkstump says

    March 8, 2013 at 3:09 pm

    Omg. I love this post. My life, in a nutshell. Seriously. If you find any tips about how to get your kids to clean up after themselves, please let the rest of us know. Currently my kids will only clean up their mess if ice cream or cookies are involved. Truth.

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 8, 2013 at 3:10 pm

      I should try that. My kids could use some fattening up!

      Reply
      • mkstump says

        March 8, 2013 at 3:11 pm

        Mine too. Which tells you how often they fall for my ice cream and cookies bribe. 🙂

        Reply
  5. Amber Perea says

    March 8, 2013 at 3:12 pm

    I have a shining piece of good news…coupled with a bad piece. My mom was a chronic organizer and cleaner. I never was. I mean, as a child, that is. She always cleaned my room out of frustration with the same spiel of, “Doesn’t it FEEL better, Amber? Isn’t everything more comfortable when it’s CLEAN?”. I shrugged (because that’s what kids do).

    Lo and behold, as an adult, I can’t be comfortable until the house is clean. Physically, it makes me feel like scrunching up my nose in discontent when I walk into a dirty room. So…will your kids pick it up in time to save your sanity? Maybe not. But they will grow up to be adults that thrive in tidy and isn’t that the most important part?

    PS- Saw the first picture and thought, “Is that her kids’ room?! How did she teach them to do THAT?!” 😉

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 8, 2013 at 3:14 pm

      ha! My mom was very similar. And, a confession: I was the messiest teenager. But, it’s true, now I can’t stand sitting down in a messy space.

      Reply
  6. Kathy says

    March 8, 2013 at 3:39 pm

    I’ve got no solutions. I can however relate. So… there’s that…

    Reply
  7. Carrie (@MildlyMedicated) says

    March 8, 2013 at 3:47 pm

    So glad the first pic isnt your real kids room, thats kind of scary. Can you imagine the issues a kid would have living in an untouchable room? I mean shy of Alice from the Brady Bunch moving in to the spare bedroom I don’t have there is no chance all 4 of my kids will have a clean room on the same day (let alone mine).
    <3 it!
    Carrie from Just Mildly Medicated

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 8, 2013 at 4:04 pm

      I know! Where’s the rest of the alphabet!!??

      Reply
  8. Jennifer DeRouen (@SassyInspired) says

    March 8, 2013 at 5:09 pm

    I can relate in so many ways! Getting my oldest and youngest to clean their rooms is like pulling teeth! My middle child however keeps his room fairly decent. Great post!

    Reply
  9. jcasey4 says

    March 9, 2013 at 7:17 am

    Ha! My husband and I both laughed out loud when we read this. This is so true, and I can guarantee you that coloured bins in our house would probably end up being used as some sort of make shift pirate ship. I have no idea how to get my kids to clean up their stuff. The best I’ve done is to get them to throw all the crap on their beds so we can vacuum. We then throw it all back on the floor for bedtime. I just pray for spring, so we can spend less time inside messing up the house, and more time destroying the backyard!! Great post.

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 9, 2013 at 7:42 am

      Me too!!!

      Reply
  10. Shana says

    March 12, 2013 at 8:01 pm

    I just laughed out loud! I almost woke up the baby…I did wake up the cat..which is worse ha! I am so glad to have found your blog and that you have shown what the true rooms of kids everywhere look like! Prepares me for the future of Pottery barn dreams unrealized lol!

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 12, 2013 at 8:26 pm

      Thanks for finding me!!!

      Reply
  11. Sue Parker says

    March 13, 2013 at 5:30 pm

    I had to snicker when I read this. It’s finally beginning to happen……

    Reply
  12. Kim Bongiorno at Let Me Start By Saying says

    March 2, 2015 at 9:36 am

    My kids are less than 2 years apart, and I felt like I was swimming in toys, too. When they were little, I bought a bunch of clear bins from little to biggish and taped pictures of what was to go inside of them as well as a label, like Transformers, Doll Stuff, Balls, LEGO, etc. The pictures made it easier for non-readers to help in the clean-up. And it gave them no excuses as to where things went. 😉

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      March 2, 2015 at 1:09 pm

      Great tip! Maybe I need to do that….

      Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Will Someone Read this 100 Years From Now? | Faking Picture Perfect says:
    March 19, 2013 at 4:16 pm

    […] for them. I’m anxious because I don’t want bad things to happen to them. I joke about the messy room because life isn’t always perfect, yet we have to find the humor in it sometimes. I write it […]

    Reply
  2. Teaching Kids How to Be Responsible… | Faking Picture Perfect says:
    April 2, 2013 at 2:38 pm

    […] a parent. It’s the kind of painstakingly slow work that makes you want to just say screw it, their rooms can stay messy. Or, “I’ll just do it […]

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  3. Five Things That Make My Blog Awesome. And By Awesome I Mean Boring. | Faking Picture Perfect says:
    April 13, 2013 at 3:19 pm

    […] The thing is, when I figured out what caused the glitch, it made me a little depressed. You see, on Thursday, I shared someone else’s writing on my blog. Granted, it was hilarious. But, I had done my research. Several people had shared it on facebook, and SEVERAL more people had put it on their blogs. So, no biggy. I didn’t think anyone would care about it that much, except maybe my few loyal followers might get a chuckle. But, I guess no one had ever posted it to…..You guessed it. Pinterest. Anyone else see the irony there? […]

    Reply
  4. Five Things That Make My Blog Awesome. And By “Awesome” I Mean Boring. | Faking Picture Perfect says:
    April 13, 2013 at 3:26 pm

    […] The thing is, when I figured out what caused the glitch, it made me a little depressed. You see, on Thursday, I shared someone else’s writing on my blog. Granted, it was hilarious. But, I had done my research. Several people had shared it on facebook, and SEVERAL more people had put it on their blogs. So, no biggy. I didn’t think anyone would care about it that much, except maybe my few loyal followers might get a chuckle. But, I guess no one had ever posted it to…..You guessed it. Pinterest. Anyone else see the irony there? […]

    Reply
  5. Even the Armpit Can Be Beautiful. | Faking Picture Perfect says:
    April 30, 2013 at 2:32 pm

    […] and cranny of the couch. They have a playroom, but it’s always a disaster. It is far from organized. The armpit is where the old couch we inherited from my in-laws sits, the mis-matched furniture, […]

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  6. Through Small and Simple Things | Faking Picture Perfect says:
    May 20, 2013 at 3:45 pm

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Welcome! I’m Meredith.

Mom. Writer. Diet Coke connoisseur. Born and raised Texan. Lover of real talk and laughter with a hint of sarcasm mixed in.

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Meredith Ethington

perfectpending

Mom • Author • Mental Health Therapist In Training
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"I don’t know about you, but I don’t really wa "I don’t know about you, but I don’t really want same-ness anymore. I want messy. I want admissions that shit is hard and we don’t have it all together. I want to have a makeup free, messy bun in my sweats run in with a mom friend and not feel worried she’s checking out my un-groomed eyebrows.

I don’t want to try to give off this illusion that I’m control of my life any better than the next person. It’s a shitshow for all of us, and we continue to hide it for fear of what? Being human?"

Read the rest on my Substack. Link in profile.
WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I MISS IT? What if I miss the best time of my life. What if it’s right this second?
What if it’s right now while I’m in finals week of grad school, and have a kid that’s sick? 
I already miss so much. The gummy smiles of babes without any teeth. The squeaky voices of 2 year olds. The babbling of a baby that’s just trying so hard to say mama. The grammar mistakes my kids make when they’re talking that I don’t have the heart to correct because I love it too much. 

I miss a lot about those younger years that have already slipped away. My youngest is sick, much like in this picture, but he is too big to snuggle in my arms now when he’s running a fever. 

Today I had the thought, what if this is it? What if this IS the happiest I’ll ever be?
For a moment, I lingered in that thought as I stood over my sink and did the dishes. I started to cry.
Am I missing it? AM I? I felt a tug that maybe I was. Maybe I wasn’t relishing enough, and enjoying enough, and being present enough.
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I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of th I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of this. *sweeps arm generally at planet earth*

Look, I’ve never been a half glass full kind of gal. I can ALWAYS find the negative in every situation. 

But, right now it’s easy to say that I’m over it. It being.....

The state of our economy. Social media. People being unemployed. People being racist and homophobic. The debate over politics. People judging people. ALLLLLL of it. 

Everything is crap right now. We joke about it a lot. We have to in order to survive. 

It’s the one millionth day of January but Spring feels so far away. 

I’m over these four damn walls that we call home. 

Yeah, I know. Even as I’m typing this it all sounds like a bunch of ungrateful whiney BS. I hear it. I don’t need you to point it out, Karen. 

But, my guess is you’re reading this right now and realizing you’re over it too. Whatever “it” is in your life.

Some days the world feels like total crap. Everything is a mess. Everything costs too much. For E-V-E-R-Y-B-O-D-Y. 

Yes, even for you Karen. ➡️➡️ to keep reading.
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But, the loss of yourself in motherhood is real. And It’s not talked about enough." 

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We all feel like imposters. 
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Some of you wanted sources on my last reel where I Some of you wanted sources on my last reel where I said we only need to be getting it right 30% of the time for our kids to have secure attachments. Well I wrote a bit more about the concept of being the “good enough mother” a term coined in the 50’s by a researcher and pediatrician. Check it all out in my newest post. Link in profile.
It’s true! Researchers have found that as long a It’s true! Researchers have found that as long as you’re doing the repair after mistakes the other times - then 30% is enough! Sometimes I worry I’m not doing it right but I definitely know I’m doing it right 30% of the time! 
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