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By Meredith Ethington

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Inspiration Kyle Parenting Practical Tips

Fireproofing

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Kyle: What if the whole universe was made of fire? Except us.

Me: That would be crazy. I don’t know, what would we do?

Kyle: We would walk around in it. Or drive through it.

Me: But, how would we keep from getting burned?

Kyle: We would be fireproof.

I love little conversations with my little boy like this in the car. It is fascinating to me to see how his mind works. I think it is just going all the time (kind of like mine) and he has a hard time shutting it off. He also told me that he had a dream the other night about strawberries dancing in his tummy. Silly boy.

But, as I watched the news this morning on my tiny iPod touch so my children would not hear/see it, I couldn’t help but think of that little conversation I had with him. Bombings, shootings, explosions. In a way, we are walking around in fire. Every single day.

Fear is something that I don’t like to let control my life. But, it does. I stand anxiously by the window as I’m waiting for my daughter to walk home from school. I tried for a long time to not allow toy guns, or other such toys in the house. But, I have two boys and I watched today as my 4 year old and 16 month old played with all his army men, tanks, and other little GI Joe figures. I heard him talk about the rocket going into the building, and a little part of me shuddered.

We walk around in fire everyday.

Sure, maybe it isn’t in a literal sense, but there is evil all around us. And, I want to protect my kids from that evil as long as possible. I record the news and watch it when they are in bed. But, sometimes I turn on the TV and for a split second, something horrible flashes across the screen before I can switch it to Sesame Street. I can’t help but think that those tiny little images remain in their brains. Even if they don’t know what’s going on, those images come out in bad dreams, and little conversations in the car.

I remember the first time I was watching a TV show (probably Law and Order) and my first born was just a baby. I frequently watched TV with her in the room thinking that she wasn’t paying any attention. And, usually, she wasn’t. She was playing happily with her own toys. Yet, in an instant, it seems, she was older. And, she was watching. Someone was shot on the show and she was staring right at the TV. She couldn’t have been much older than a year old. But, I remember being horrified that she had seen violence at such a young age. I felt guilty, of course, and immediately turned the TV off.

I wish we could fireproof our children in someway. And, I believe we can. I believe it is through the refuge and safety we create in our own homes. Through the way we teach our children, and how we follow the teachings of a loving God. It is hard to have faith though, when the fire is touching the lives of all of those around us. And sometimes, fireproofing is not enough. There will always be little innocent lives that get lost. That get cut short.

The best we can do is try not to be afraid and walk through the fire with our heads held high. Teach our children to stand up for what they believe in. Walk Tall. Teach them who they are and what there is to be proud of. Teaching them IS fireproofing them against an evil world. We can turn the TV off and make our homes a safe haven where they don’t think about those things. Because they do hear about it. They talk about it even as young as 6 years old. I was angry when my daughter heard about the Newtown shooting at school. But, we can’t live in fear. Because then, evil wins.

So, I for one, am going to do the best I can to “fireproof” my family, walk through the fire that surrounds us every single day. And, have faith that there is Someone greater than all of us that is in control of it all.


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Comments

  1. Amber Perea says

    April 19, 2013 at 2:18 pm

    What a beautiful metaphor! 🙂

    Reply
  2. Rayna Drago says

    April 19, 2013 at 2:30 pm

    Well said 🙂

    Reply
  3. Michelle says

    April 19, 2013 at 4:11 pm

    Very nice post. My son was eating breakfast this morning and turned to me and said, “I feel sad for the people who got hurt by the bombs”…..the fact that he even had to utter those words at his age was so sad to me.

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      April 20, 2013 at 6:39 am

      It is sad to me too!

      Reply
  4. monk-monk says

    April 19, 2013 at 6:13 pm

    This is beautifully written…I like that you hold the tension between protecting your kids but also knowing that they will see and hear things that are hard for them. I feel like too many people go one extreme or the other…shelter from everything or “sure I let my kid watch rated R horror film at 5, it’s just make-believe!”

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      April 20, 2013 at 6:38 am

      Ha! So true.

      Reply
  5. The Momplex Blog says

    April 19, 2013 at 10:37 pm

    Very thoughtful piece. I really connect to what you have to say, not just in this post but in general when I read your blog. Just told my husband earlier this week, “I feel like one of our jobs is to raise brave kids. Somebody has to be brave.” And I didn’t like it, but once I said it, I realized that total sheltering from all the evil in the news (my usual M.O.) may not be entirely spot-on. It’s hard to know when the time is right to start letting the world suck their innocence away. 🙁

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      April 20, 2013 at 6:38 am

      I agree. I think it’s so hard because I am a highly anxious person. But I’ve learned turning the news off is good for me too!

      Reply
  6. itycharles says

    April 20, 2013 at 6:52 am

    Our kids belongs to the future and what we teach them or what they learn at their age is what they grow up with. i wish every parent will fireproof their kids against the evil that is looming around. great post!

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      April 20, 2013 at 11:05 am

      Thank you!!

      Reply

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Welcome! I’m Meredith.

Mom. Writer. Diet Coke connoisseur. Born and raised Texan. Lover of real talk and laughter with a hint of sarcasm mixed in.

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Meredith Ethington

perfectpending

Mom • Author • Mental Health Therapist In Training
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Sure, you can commiserate with a fellow parent about teenagers being the worst.

But, to be honest - they’re not the worst. They’re kind of amazing. But their problems make me tired to my core." 

Read the latest on my substack. I promise you'll relate. ❤️
So sweet. ❤️ Follow me @perfectpending and bet So sweet. ❤️
Follow me @perfectpending and better yet buy my book or subscribe to my substack to support me.
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WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I MISS IT? What if I miss the best time of my life. What if it’s right this second?
What if it’s right now while I’m in finals week of grad school, and have a kid that’s sick? 
I already miss so much. The gummy smiles of babes without any teeth. The squeaky voices of 2 year olds. The babbling of a baby that’s just trying so hard to say mama. The grammar mistakes my kids make when they’re talking that I don’t have the heart to correct because I love it too much. 

I miss a lot about those younger years that have already slipped away. My youngest is sick, much like in this picture, but he is too big to snuggle in my arms now when he’s running a fever. 

Today I had the thought, what if this is it? What if this IS the happiest I’ll ever be?
For a moment, I lingered in that thought as I stood over my sink and did the dishes. I started to cry.
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I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of th I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of this. *sweeps arm generally at planet earth*

Look, I’ve never been a half glass full kind of gal. I can ALWAYS find the negative in every situation. 

But, right now it’s easy to say that I’m over it. It being.....

The state of our economy. Social media. People being unemployed. People being racist and homophobic. The debate over politics. People judging people. ALLLLLL of it. 

Everything is crap right now. We joke about it a lot. We have to in order to survive. 

It’s the one millionth day of January but Spring feels so far away. 

I’m over these four damn walls that we call home. 

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But, my guess is you’re reading this right now and realizing you’re over it too. Whatever “it” is in your life.

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We all feel like imposters. 
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