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By Meredith Ethington

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Kyle

Our Freaking Bedtime Routine

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Kyle sleeping in the stroller after a long flight home from California recently. When this kid is out, he’s OUT.

This is how bedtime went down tonight. And, unfortunately, most nights.

Read a story. Said prayers. Sang a song (to each individual child on their respective beds because they do share a room, but need their own song and time with mommy). Hugs. Kisses. Good nights. Love yous.

Exit room.

End of story? No freaking way.

Literally 1 minute after leaving, “Mommy!” (Kyle is usually the perpetrator)

Husband rushes in there so the baby doesn’t get woken up in his room right next door. “What Kyle?”

“I don’t think I can fall asleep”

Some conversation between Dad and kid takes place. Exit Room.

2 minutes later…

“Daddy!” (Guess who? Kyle.)

I go running in there. “What Kyle?”

“Can you throw this away for me?”

Me, blinded by the darkness of the room, “What is it?”

“A string”

BIG SIGH. “OK Kyle. You didn’t need to call me in here for that. Go to sleep!”

2 minutes later.

“Mommy!” (It’s Avery…slowly getting more frustrated and starting to cry)

“You go” I say to the husband.

JD goes in and hears, “Kyle won’t stop tapping the side of his bed.” Threatening 4 year old with iPod privileges takes place.

Quiet.

Kyle doesn’t mess around when it comes to the iPod.

And, I understand why that one guy wrote this book. I haven’t read it, but 20 bucks says I can relate.

 


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Comments

  1. TheAwakenedMomma says

    March 12, 2013 at 9:33 pm

    Bed time can be a nightmare! Here I am at 11:30pm and my toddler is just now closing his bright eyes. For my sanity though I let him decide when he’s tired. I tried for the first half of his life to force a routine and almost swore off having more kids. This way works better for us most of the time but I know with multiple children that share a room it would be way too tricky to let them decide when they’re tired. I hope they at least sleep the whole night through for ya!

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 12, 2013 at 9:35 pm

      They do most of the time. And I’m soo much a routine mama which works great for us but he just fights it. I think his brain works on overdrive like mine!

      Reply
  2. donofalltrades says

    March 13, 2013 at 5:52 am

    Hey, I thought no F word! It’s a great version on YouTube narrated by Samuel Jackson. You should check it out. I’m no Mormon, but during prayers can you throw in a “oh and please, Jesus (you people pray to Jesus, right?) let it be known to my children that you will open the gates of hell and send fire breathing cats shaved like lions into their room to scratch their eyes out, if any of them makes a sound and doesn’t go to sleep. Amen”

    Youre welcome! I’ve been told I should write a parenting book.

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      March 13, 2013 at 6:54 am

      Ha!

      Reply
  3. miamamma35 says

    March 13, 2013 at 7:59 am

    Oh bedtimes, they are the worst. If we put the boys in their room together, all we hear is bumping and thumping and squealing up there until we separate them. They really need their own rooms!!! I’m also a routine kind of mom……and mama needs her blogging time at night!!!

    Reply
  4. mkstump says

    March 13, 2013 at 11:11 am

    Oh yeah. That book is awesome. I love it. Will never read it outloud, obviously, but it pretty much hits the nail on the head. 🙂

    Reply

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Welcome! I’m Meredith.

Mom. Writer. Diet Coke connoisseur. Born and raised Texan. Lover of real talk and laughter with a hint of sarcasm mixed in.

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