Perfection Pending

By Meredith Ethington

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Motherhood

A Face Toucher, A Messy Room, and A Head Under A Blanket

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Let’s lighten things up a bit. I feel like my posts have been boring even me lately. Except for my failed DIY attempt post. That one was quite entertaining if I do say so myself.

Life has been busy lately. This motherhood gig keeps me on my toes daily. I love/hate it. We’ve had 3 rounds of pink eye over here, and then about 24 hours of healthy before another cold struck the two oldest. Ironically it was 24 hours after the flu mist. I say ironic because my husband who is a medical “professional” (not sure why that is in quotes..he really is) claims that doesn’t happen. You know, getting sick because of the flu shot/mist. Anyway, I was lamenting about the four-year-old having yet another ear infection on FB. Here was my status:

Good news is: I love that my husband can check my kids’ ears. Bad News: Kyle has another ear infection. That kid can’t catch a break. I swear I’m ready to tube him up, or yank those tonsils out!

Everyone was so nice saying things like, “When our daughter got tubes she never had one again”, or “when we took Jr.’s tonsils out he was a new superhuman” OK, no one said that, and I don’t think any of my friends really call their kids jr. But, anywho. People were nice and sympathetic. You know, the way facebook should be. In a perfect world.

And, my response? “I think I actually need to cut off his hands so he’ll stop touching his face. That would do it.”

The poor kid touches his face constantly. His eyes water if you say the word “eyes”. I’m serious. If you ever meet him, try it. He says his face feels itchy, and when I ask where, he points to his eyebrows. He asked me the other day why we had eyebrows. My response was, “I don’t have a clue”. Because believe me, there are days when I wish I didn’t have eyebrows either. But, the kid has issues. And, he touches the facial area CONSTANTLY. I think there is a slight sensory issue going on. When there is a cold, life is miserable and very very wet for a few days. So, yeah, I think the only thing that will keep him from not getting sick is chopping off his hands. And, that’s not really an option is it? Is it?

So, yeah, there’s that. And, then there’s the realization that my daughter is very much like me in one way despite the post I wrote yesterday. Funny how the universe knows that when you claim something is true, it will show the opposite to be true. Case in point: Her bedroom. I think the thing I hated most as a teenager was putting away, sorting, hanging up, or folding any sort of clothing item. Come to think of it, I still hate that. Now that she has her own room, I think she feels like she can do whatever she wants in there. Like NEVER. EVER. put her clothes in the actual hamper. I guess it’s too inconvenient that it’s located in her closet. In her bedroom. I think I should maybe just place the hamper in the center of her room for a few days and see what happens.

P1040853

Actually now that I think of it, that’s a genius idea. And, since I don’t ever do real science experiments, maybe I can turn this motherhood gig into a big giant experiment. Here’s my first hypothesis: I think that if the laundry basket is placed in the middle of the room, she will move it into the closet and continue to throw her clothes on the floor.

Oooh. Now I’m excited for bath time tonight to see what happens! See, science can be fun!

Last, but certainly not least, little Chan Man. He’s great. He’s napping right now after an eventful morning at the park. Hopefully it will be a good long one since he has the cold that Mr. Face Toucher gave him. I forgot to grab the dirty laundry out of his closet though, so I ran back in, risking waking him up from his nap that he had just started, and found this:

P1040852

Yep. He’s asleep like that. On purpose. I did worry about SIDS for a quick second, but when I went to pull down the blanket, he pulled it back up again. Whatever works, dude. Have a great nap little man! Please don’t suffocate.

That’s what happens when you have three kids. You stop worrying about SIDS and just embrace the unexpected. Motherhood is a roller coaster, and you never know what’s coming around the next loopity loop. Here’s to hoping it’s not someone throwing up.

daynight1 Join in the awesome link up here. What does a day in YOUR life look like?

 


6 Comments

« Maybe We Should Say to Our Daughters: You are Not Me. And I’m OK With That.
One Thing No One Ever Told Me About Parenting »

Comments

  1. Winding road says

    October 22, 2013 at 3:01 pm

    Love it!! My kid constantly has her hands on her face or in an orifice and it makes me crazy. And her lil brother has a cold too..throwing up is always dreaded. Isn’t that funny how all moms dread vomiting when it tends to be over with quicker than the snotty noses? Anyway, hope yours are better soon. Love the post, so funny!

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      October 22, 2013 at 3:06 pm

      Thanks!! Yes, I’ve never thought about the throwing up vs. snotty nose thing. But, boy do I DREAD the throwing up.

      Reply
      • Winding road says

        October 22, 2013 at 3:12 pm

        I do too because you know that probably within 24 hrs you will be too! And it’s just gross

        Reply
  2. Melissa @ Completely Eclipsed says

    October 22, 2013 at 6:25 pm

    You are a brave woman risking a mission into a sleeping child’s room, but I’ve done it too mainly because my hatred for laundry supercedes my love of naps. And, I know this wasn’t the point of your post but you totally just reminded me that I need to get my eyebrows waxed.

    Stopping by from SITS

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      October 22, 2013 at 8:32 pm

      Thanks for stopping by. And, I’m glad I could remind you of your eyebrow maintenance! 🙂

      Reply

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  1. One Thing No One Ever Told Me About Parenting | Perfection Pending says:
    October 23, 2013 at 4:03 pm

    […] sneaking into the child’s room while they are napping. This is of course only when it’s practically a life or death situation. But still. On the […]

    Reply

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Welcome! I’m Meredith.

Mom. Writer. Diet Coke connoisseur. Born and raised Texan. Lover of real talk and laughter with a hint of sarcasm mixed in.

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Meredith Ethington

perfectpending

Mom • Author • Mental Health Therapist In Training
Grab my new book, The Mother Load, available now. 👇👇

Night night! 😤 Night night! 😤
If you missed my last post about how raising teens If you missed my last post about how raising teens can wreck you mentally….wellll this is part of the reason why. So lonely! But we are in this together somehow. 😂 Make sure to check out my latest substack and grab a copy of my book —- The Mother Load!
NEW ---> "When there are problems in these big kid NEW ---> "When there are problems in these big kid years, it’s no longer really acceptable to call a friend and air the annoyances of the situation. At least not the specifics.

Sure, you can commiserate with a fellow parent about teenagers being the worst.

But, to be honest - they’re not the worst. They’re kind of amazing. But their problems make me tired to my core." 

Read the latest on my substack. I promise you'll relate. ❤️
So sweet. ❤️ Follow me @perfectpending and bet So sweet. ❤️
Follow me @perfectpending and better yet buy my book or subscribe to my substack to support me.
"I don’t know about you, but I don’t really wa "I don’t know about you, but I don’t really want same-ness anymore. I want messy. I want admissions that shit is hard and we don’t have it all together. I want to have a makeup free, messy bun in my sweats run in with a mom friend and not feel worried she’s checking out my un-groomed eyebrows.

I don’t want to try to give off this illusion that I’m control of my life any better than the next person. It’s a shitshow for all of us, and we continue to hide it for fear of what? Being human?"

Read the rest on my Substack. Link in profile.
WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I MISS IT? What if I miss the best time of my life. What if it’s right this second?
What if it’s right now while I’m in finals week of grad school, and have a kid that’s sick? 
I already miss so much. The gummy smiles of babes without any teeth. The squeaky voices of 2 year olds. The babbling of a baby that’s just trying so hard to say mama. The grammar mistakes my kids make when they’re talking that I don’t have the heart to correct because I love it too much. 

I miss a lot about those younger years that have already slipped away. My youngest is sick, much like in this picture, but he is too big to snuggle in my arms now when he’s running a fever. 

Today I had the thought, what if this is it? What if this IS the happiest I’ll ever be?
For a moment, I lingered in that thought as I stood over my sink and did the dishes. I started to cry.
Am I missing it? AM I? I felt a tug that maybe I was. Maybe I wasn’t relishing enough, and enjoying enough, and being present enough.
But, then I realized, it will never be ENOUGH. 

Read the rest in my substack ❤️
New year, same me. 😂 #mentalhealth #anxiety #de New year, same me. 😂
#mentalhealth #anxiety #depression
"I don't care" as I literally care about every sin "I don't care" as I literally care about every single thing.
I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of th I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of this. *sweeps arm generally at planet earth*

Look, I’ve never been a half glass full kind of gal. I can ALWAYS find the negative in every situation. 

But, right now it’s easy to say that I’m over it. It being.....

The state of our economy. Social media. People being unemployed. People being racist and homophobic. The debate over politics. People judging people. ALLLLLL of it. 

Everything is crap right now. We joke about it a lot. We have to in order to survive. 

It’s the one millionth day of January but Spring feels so far away. 

I’m over these four damn walls that we call home. 

Yeah, I know. Even as I’m typing this it all sounds like a bunch of ungrateful whiney BS. I hear it. I don’t need you to point it out, Karen. 

But, my guess is you’re reading this right now and realizing you’re over it too. Whatever “it” is in your life.

Some days the world feels like total crap. Everything is a mess. Everything costs too much. For E-V-E-R-Y-B-O-D-Y. 

Yes, even for you Karen. ➡️➡️ to keep reading.
Yes. Boundaries are healthy and good. And they mea Yes. Boundaries are healthy and good. And they mean someone loves you that much to communicate them! Love this wisdom from @wittyidiot
NEW POST ----> "This is not a post about loss of a NEW POST ----> "This is not a post about loss of a loved one. Or loss of a child. Those things are real, and they’re heart wrenching. And, this post is certainly not to compare that loss with the one I’m going to talk about.

But, the loss of yourself in motherhood is real. And It’s not talked about enough." 

Do you feel like you lost yourself in motherhood? How? I really want to know. 

Psss - I am in grad school to become a therapist, and am not ashamed to ask that you subscribe to my paid substack. I just lowered the cost to $36/year! That's like $4/month and you'll have access to all my previous posts, and some new weekly short posts to give you ideas to help with balancing motherhood and your own mental health. I'm learning a lot in school, and will only continue to do so, so subscribe and we'll support each other. ❤️
This memory made me laugh this morning. 🤣 This memory made me laugh this morning. 🤣
Saaaame. @womenwhorunwiththemoon Saaaame. @womenwhorunwiththemoon
I’m sorry are you really wearing doc martens and I’m sorry are you really wearing doc martens and a dress with spaghetti straps and a Tshirt under it while you’re telling me I’m doing it wrong? 🤣 Life is wild. Teenagers are fun.
Found in my pediatricians office. 🤣 What’s th Found in my pediatricians office. 🤣 What’s the moral of the story friends? If you think your household is always sick - it’s because they probably are. Kids make everything more germ-y
Here’s what I do know 👇 No one knows what th Here’s what I do know 👇

No one knows what they’re doing. 
We all feel like imposters. 
Our kids love us anyway. 
We’re all going to be OK. 
You’ve got this (as much as any of us do) 😘

#momspiration #momlife #funnymoms #memtalhealth #parentinglife #parentingquotes
"By trying to be perfect, we're actually trying to "By trying to be perfect, we're actually trying to avoid being human." 

Do you struggle with perfectionism? Parenthood has helped me quite a bit, but It's something I've battled my whole life. I still struggle occasionally, although it's gotten better. But, let's stop trying to avoid being human and instead embrace ourselves an in turn embrace the entire human race. ❤️ I'd love to hear how you embrace being imperfect. 

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Mood. Mood.
Some of you wanted sources on my last reel where I Some of you wanted sources on my last reel where I said we only need to be getting it right 30% of the time for our kids to have secure attachments. Well I wrote a bit more about the concept of being the “good enough mother” a term coined in the 50’s by a researcher and pediatrician. Check it all out in my newest post. Link in profile.
It’s true! Researchers have found that as long a It’s true! Researchers have found that as long as you’re doing the repair after mistakes the other times - then 30% is enough! Sometimes I worry I’m not doing it right but I definitely know I’m doing it right 30% of the time! 
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