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By Meredith Ethington

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Staring into the Fish Bowl is Making Us Crazy

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Yesterday, I read one too many Miley Cyrus posts. Everyone had their opinions. Everyone shared their outrage in one direction or another. And, everyone seemed to write about it. And, I read the posts like everyone else. 

I went back and forth with thoughts like, “That poor, troubled girl” to “My kid will never do that” to “YOLO”. Just kidding about that last one. This rule-following mormon Mama of 3 has never uttered the words YOLO. 

But, what I found most disturbing was that as I was reading all of these blogs, I found myself getting invested in this whole Miley Cyrus thing. It’s not that I didn’t care at all. Because, I do have an opinion on it. But, I just kind of felt like, what does my opinion matter? It’s all been said. Like 3,452 times. And then tweeted, and shared, and liked, and re-blogged.

But, as I was reading all of these blogs, I felt like maybe I should care more than I already did. So, I did what any 36 year old, mormon mother of three would do and went to her twitter page. And, no, I’m not a follower. In fact, I don’t even really get twitter. 

But, all of the writing about this girl (who, frankly, had no impact on my life whatsoever in any way) made me feel like I needed to check things out a little more. I suddenly felt like I needed to have more of an opinion. And, maybe even share it? So of course, I wanted to see what she was tweeting after the big scandal of the VMA’s (that I did not watch except for a short excerpt on the Today show). I was on her twitter page for about 2 minutes and realized two things. 1. That most of her instagram photos were not permitted by my browser and it’s settings for inappropriate content, and 2.  That she didn’t seem to care one bit about all the moms and dads up in arms about her behavior. 

And, all of the sudden it hit me. Why do I care? 

And, the answer came crashing down on me. It’s because I am a blogger. And, blogging makes me care about things that are:

A. Important

and

B. Not Important. 

Now, if you will look at the past 8 months of my blogging life (as compared to the first 5 years of it) you will see that I have taken to blogging almost daily. So, yeah, I love it. But, somewhere in this newly-rekindled love of blogging, I’ve also seen it for what it can be. Something to feed our own egos, start the latest mommy war, get a tiny bit of fame, and suddenly need to speak up about topics that really aren’t all that important in the big scheme of things. 

Now, don’t misunderstand me. I do care about my own children and their moral behavior. I do care about women’s rights, and social issues. I’m a mormon for crying out loud. So, that goes without saying, right? We’re some of the most strict, rule-following religious people out there. So, yes, I have an opinion. But, what I realized was that the Miley Cyrus debacle was no different than a million debacles in the past.  And, suddenly, I was invested because of a few blog posts shared on Facebook. 

And, I desperately did NOT want to jump on the bandwagon and write another Miley Cyrus post sharing MY opinions on it, or writing an open letter to her, or my daughter, or her Dad, or her Dad’s cat. Because, everyone is to blame for her behavior, right?

But, here I am writing a post. 

Many have said that they feel sorry for her because she lives in a fish bowl, and that her behavior is no different than any other celebrity making stupid decisions, but I also can’t help but wonder about all of us that are looking INTO that fish bowl. What does it say about us? 

Image

source

Suddenly, we care way more than we should. Sure, it’s important to take a stand for what we believe in and have an opinion about important topics, but suddenly we are taking a stand, and having an opinion about EVERY topic. And, we’re all sharing it on Facebook in the hopes to accomplish what? 

It’s doubtful that we are truly going to sway the opinion of our very liberal friend or very conservative one to the other side. And, it’s certainly doubtful that we are going to make a change in the media by talking incessantly in the media about the media and their appalling behavior. Nope, none of that is going to happen. So, why are we all staring into that fish bowl so intently? We’re suddenly reading things, watching things, tweeting things, and judging things with all the energy of our souls in the hopes to save another from making the same mistake that yet another mis-guided celebrity is making. When, really, if we would just cover up that fish bowl, or turn it off every once in a while, or for those of us who are truly extreme: get rid of the fish bowl, then we might all be a little less irritated by the world going on around us, that isn’t really a part of our world at all. 

I’m sure I’m not the only one who was suddenly curious about Miley when in my day to day life before her “scandal” I had scarcely given her a second thought except to change the radio stations when her songs came on. I do like that one though….

The fish bowl is making us crazy, I tell you. And, I’m including me in that us. 

And, I find it quite ironic that all of us crazy moms and dads who suddenly have an opinion about Miley or any other irrelevant-to-our-lives-person-of-the-hour are finding our own kind of fame, turmoil, and wars in that fishbowl. Just because we suddenly have an opinion about something that really doesn’t matter all that much. And then there’s the irony of this post. It’s enough to give me a headache.

Instead, I learned a lesson by looking into that fish bowl myself. I need to take a step back and focus on what is right in front of me. Three little people that I am doing my best to raise to be good people despite what anyone in that fish bowl is doing.

*And if you are one of the many that blogged about Miley, I’m not judging. I hope you can appreciate the irony found here. And, be nice. It’s my birthday. 

 

 


9 Comments

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Comments

  1. TraceyLynnTobin says

    August 29, 2013 at 3:12 pm

    Dear lord, YES. A million times YES. I try to avoid this type of behavior on my own blog, but so often it can be hard NOT to comment on the “Scandal of the Week” because you feel like if everyone else in the world is talking about it, it must be important, right?

    But when it really comes down to it, a lot of things that the world wide web deems SERIOUS BUSINESS does not matter to me one iota. So why frustrate myself wasting my energy on it?

    Sorry to get a little bit ranty, but I come from a family who watches a lot of E-TV and follows the lives of celebrities, and I’m the exact opposite of that, so, yeah…lol

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      August 29, 2013 at 3:29 pm

      rants are allowed as long as they agree with mine! 😉

      Reply
  2. tric says

    August 29, 2013 at 3:37 pm

    I did not watch her unforgettable performance and had no great interest in it. What did fascinate me was so many mothers judging a young girl. I am an experienced mom, ( in other words am a bit older and so are my children) and the one thing I have learned is anything is possible with children. I am just glad that today none of mine seem to be taking drugs, drinking, pregnant, dropping out of school or in trouble with the police. This does not mean that I have no ambitions for them but it does mean that I will not be too quick to judge another child or parent, just in case it could be me some day!

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      August 29, 2013 at 3:39 pm

      Good point.

      Reply
  3. bensbitterblog says

    August 29, 2013 at 4:28 pm

    Way to take a step back. That is what I have to do every once in a while and realize what is most important.

    Reply
  4. monk-monk says

    August 29, 2013 at 6:20 pm

    Yeah, I definitely resonate with this! I also think that the fishbowl isn’t just relagated to celebrities…I think about all the news stories that I come across that get me scared about the state of the world (and in years past I wouldn’t have even known about). Not saying the chemical warfare in Syria or the tornadoes in the midwest or the birth of King George aren’t important…because they are…but do I need to lose sleep over all the different news stories every day?

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      August 29, 2013 at 8:55 pm

      exactly!

      Reply
  5. whatthemom says

    August 29, 2013 at 7:28 pm

    Happy birthday!

    Reply
    • fakingpictureperfect says

      August 29, 2013 at 8:56 pm

      Thank you!

      Reply

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Welcome! I’m Meredith.

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