To keep myself entertained today, I’ve decided to keep track of the number of times my 2 year old says, “Mommy.”
It’s been a long sick week of colds around here, and too much together time. So, yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m going insane.
I said to my two year old a few minutes ago: “Stop saying my name!!”
He responded quickly, “Mommy! ame!”
And, since I decided five minutes ago to start keeping track of how many times he says it, I’m already up to 12!! Does anyone else find this alarming? 12 times in 5 minutes= roughly 1,728 times in a 12 hour day. So, yes. The TV is now on, and I’m enjoying a moment of complete silence.
I’m afraid that I might die one day when I drive myself off a cliff. Tombstone will read, “Her kids got another cold, and they couldn’t stop saying her name. She felt compelled to end it all. May she rest in peace.” K. Maybe that’s a little too wordy for a tombstone, but maybe in my eulogy? But, before you worry that I’m planning my death…don’t. I have too much stuff I need to get at the grocery store today. Kleenex being #1.
I’ve blogged before, about the exorbitant amount of tissues we go through around here when Kyle gets sick. It’s pretty incredible. I was thinking that with the amount of tissues we go through, we could clothe a small nation. That is if you could sew together tissues. And, if I could sew period.
I’m afraid this post is a little rambly.
I was going to write yesterday about the newborn hangover I experienced. No, I don’t have a newborn, but I’m talking about the nights when you get so little sleep that you remember what it’s like to have a newborn. And, I vowed to never have one of those again. Not the night…..The newborn.
You see, the night before last, I got 2 hours of sleep. The boys. The sick ones. Were up literally all night. They were screaming for tissues mostly. Yes, I put a box in the 5 year olds bed, but I don’t trust the 2 year old with that responsibility. He would have them all out of the box in 28 seconds. When I showered yesterday, I even had to do a quick training session for the 5 year old.
“Ok, when Mommy is in the shower, if Chandler screams, that means he wants a kleenex. Just go get one and hand it to him, ok?”
But, I’ve also trained them that if they can’t get to the trashcan right away (like when they are eating or in bed), to just throw them down on the ground. So, my house looked like this yesterday.
Gross, I know.
But, we do what we have to do to survive around here.
So, the newborn hangover, is the closest thing I think I will ever feel to an actual hangover. And, honestly, I’m glad I don’t drink.
I woke up with puffy eyes, a pounding headache, and feeling like I’d been hit by a mack truck. Luckily, I didn’t do any vomiting, but I did have to motivate myself to simply move through the day. All I wanted to do was stay in bed with the covers over my head. Is that what a hangover feels like? Why, for the love, do you people drink?
2 hours of sleep made me feel super yelly, too. But, I think all in all, we did pretty good surviving it.
So, here are my tips for surviving a cold when you are housebound for days:
Created with PicMonkey
Don’t have kids.
If you’ve already failed at my first tip, then try these:
Train your kids to wipe their own noses.
Use the TV. Those pins on pinterest that say, “Indoor activities that will entertain for hours” are lies. You’re welcome. I just saved you hundreds of hours of wasted time on pinterest looking for the perfect activity for your kid. Instead, give yourself a break and use what we have been given as one of the most precious gifts in parenting. TVs and tablets.
Let go of a clean house. If you train them to wipe their own noses, you cannot also be naive enough to expect a clean house. So, just let it go for a few days. It won’t kill you.
Invest in ear plugs. While you don’t really need to “invest” per se, you really should buy some. It could come in handy for a plethora of things like, sleeping through the night, taking a nap, or drowning out the high pitched, “Mommy!” you will hear 1,728 times today.
And, if you want, real more practical advice than that, then you might want to hit up pinterest. I know my picmonkey graphic made this look you might receive real, useful advice, but I am just plain out of that. When you’re on pinterest though, just don’t get distracted by those other posts we talked about.
I think we’ll survive today too even though the Mommy count is up to 22 and I just heard from the other room, “Mommy….nose!”
But, Kyle just came to me, and said, “Mommy, even though it’s not Valentine’s Day yet, I made you this.”
A Mom’s day can always be made better by popsicle sticks held together by a heart sticker. Am I right? Here’s to looking forward to a weekend with sick kids, and possibly a husband with the man cold.
But, after this week, the man cold looks like a walk in the park.
Oh noooooooo. I well remember these days. I thought it was quite, quite normal for a child to have a continuous cold for like 18 months until my New Zealand pal – mother of four – mentioned she’d like to book a doctor’s appt. for my son. Oh. My guys got every cold that was available. Every single one. It got to the point where when we had a healthy patch of any length I’d call them “windows of health.”
Perhaps, if you don’t have one – get a dog? Mine likes to eat tissues lying around. On that note …. hang in there.
ha! No thank you on the dog. 🙂 That would totally gross me out even more to see him eating snotty kleenexes!
A man cold. Ha! Never heard of that. Another way I’m dealing with the current cold is with my camera. I actually got a picture of snot shooting out of a toddler nose during a sneeze. It’s gross, but it’s something to do.
hahahah! Thanks for the tip. Please tell me you didn’t post that on FB
Oh, Meredith, you have my utmost empathy here. I too have had days (regularly, I might add) where I feel compelled to count the number of times my “name” (remember when we had real ones?) has been uttered by my toddler. I SO feel your pain. Your tips for survival? Hilarious- you should think about submitting them somewhere. The first one in particular cracked me up big time. Sending you positive energy for health, rest, and SILENCE!!! xo
Ha! You’re kind. Especially considering I just re-read this post and it is riddled with errors. 🙂 But, silence sounds nice so, I’m going to try and feel that positive energy coming from you. 😉
Hahahaha, oh my gosh, I am SO SICK OF HEARING “mama.” I am right there with you going insane, but my kids don’t even have colds. I am just going insane because I’m losing it. 🙂 Yesterday I told them I was going to drive them up to the church and leave them there for awhile so Jesus could take care of them while Mommy goes away for a break. I’m pretty sure that’s wrong on a million levels, but oh well. 🙂 Hang in there and use that TV as much as you can!
Yes. I’m not going to lie. The overuse of the word “Mommy!” is common around here. Sickness or not. And, that cracks me up about leaving them at church so Jesus can take care of them. Hilarious! (as long as you don’t really do it) 😉
Oh Meredith…another good blog as usual. I laughed out loud with your first tip for how to avoid the kid cold! Failed that one!! At least your kids use a tissue. Mine either just let it all run out or use their hands and sleeves and anything they can get their hands on. It’s disgusting.
When are we going out and leaving the kids with the hubbies????!!!
I totally get what you are saying about hearing mom a thousand times a day. I actually told my girls to call me something else one day. They chose macaroni and cheese face. Not sure where that came from but it worked. I have to say it was what lightened my mood that particular day and made me get through it with a laugh. Love that you share these stories. Sometimes as a mom I feel like I am the only one going crazy some days.
ha! macaroni and cheese face is awesome. 🙂
C has already had two colds this winter and interestingly enough, her energy levels also seem to spike when her nose is running. Today I was Skyping with my best friend and she walked around the kitchen for what felt like 30 minutes chanting my name. C, not my friend. Lulz.
HA! Yes, I think Chandler thinks my name is a noun, a verb, an adjective, and a swear word. He’s used it in every way possible. It’s exhausting.
I am all about TV on those days when I just really can’t be bothered.
Only trouble is that Monkey doesn’t feel the same way. He won’t stay put on the couch, and tends to try forward rolls off the edge, or jumping over the back of it, or crazy dancing in the middle of the floor and almost squashing the dog.
I love the kid, but I sometimes wish he was a droid. Then I could power him down now and again.
Oh my gosh! that would be amazing…the droid idea!
Ohhhhhhhhh I feel you’re pain! My 3 all have had colds this week and man alive am I over it!! I have heard “mummy, mummy, mummy” far too many….when I told my 3 year old – “please stop saying my name” his response was, “why, is it not your name?” I replied, “well yes it is”….”well then mummy I need to say it”…….”why?”……”so you know I’m sick” !!!!!!!!! Oh boy. Here’s hoping for a better weekend 🙂 xx
Ha!! You too!!
Those days are gone in my house except when my granddaughter comes over and then it is a welcome time.
Yes, I’m sure it is! 🙂
A newborn hangover is worse than a real hangover if you ask me. With a drinking hangover I usually get more sleep and am not expected to undertake any great feats of parenting the next day!
Good to know! I felt HORRIBLE that day.
I’m laughing so hard! We are going through this at our home right now, too. I’ve even considered changing my name to “Daddy,” if only because it’s yelled so much less frequently. Thanks for the laugh.
Oh my gosh. That’s a good idea. Did you see the comment where someone else told her kids to call her a different name? And they chose macaroni and cheese face?? Ha!
I loved this. It’s so real. I’ve tried too many times to do crafts with snot nosed children and it inevitably ends up with a frustrated Mommy and snot covered crafts. Not worth it. The TV is the way to go. Hope your little ones get well soon!
Thanks! They are doing better!! 🙂
Aww, what a sweet gift! We could all do with these tips, though.
So this might sound really gross to you, but ya know what I did/do? I give my kids a TOWEL. They use it through the night… and I wash it first thing in the morning- oh WHO AM I KIDDING?? I throw it in the basement and who the hell knows when I wash it.
But the towel. Yeah, it works!!! I give them a fresh one for the day. it’s gonna get gross up in your house anyway- stick with the towel!
Awesome. Yes we’ve done a rag that they carry around in a bowl.
Ahh we have days like this too! The next time I get sick, I’m gonna do what they do to me! I’ll call them by name 5 times every minute!