I’ve heard a lot friends lamenting about being depressed right now because of the pandemic. Being cooped up in our houses for so long feels frustrating. Home schooling was a joke. We are entering summer and many of us still have lockdown guidelines leaving us feeling trapped.
To be honest – the world in general is a lot right now.
And with all the pandemic stuff aside, we have social justice issues, an upcoming election, murder hornets, and probably alien invasions next if 2020 stays going in the direction it has been.
You might see people talking about feeling sad, or lonely, or depressed, or anxious.
But, what about those of us who are just – angry?
I have written time and time again about how my anxiety manifests as anger.
Every time I do – I get messages from moms in my inbox.
Things like, “It’s so good to know I’m not alone.”
“I had no idea others felt this way, too.”
“I never realized that my anxiety could look like anger.”
I have a feeling that a lot of us are angry right now. And it’s probably not an easy pill to swallow to admit that.
Feeling lonely and depressed right now seems more socially acceptable. If you are binge-eating cookies and baking all day, there’s a Covid19 Meme for that.
But, if you’re angry? And you’re possibly taking that out on your family? Well, that’s not so socially acceptable to admit.
I have admitted before that I’m a yeller. And, I’m still a good mom. But, I’ll let you in on a secret – if you’re angry right now, you’re also a good mom.
There’s a lot to be angry about right now. Now, let’s replace that word angry with anxious. There’s a lot to be anxious about right now. Oooh Boy. Isn’t that the truth.
Husbands working from home.
Wives working from home.
Being cooped up 24/7 with our precious angels.
Big emotions from kids that don’t get what’s going on.
Big emotions from us.
Social justice issues.
Social media telling us we are all doing something wrong.
Do I need to go on?
Anxiety and anger are often not talked about like I wish they would be.
Mostly because it’s important for women to recognize the signs when they feel like an angry mom. It’s not pretty, and it feels shameful. We have our sweet little cherubs who we would die for, and yet – we’re lashing out, yelling, and want to be alone.
Who wants to share that with anyone?
But, mamas – let me say this with all the love in my heart for you. Your anger might just be anxiety.
You’re scared. You’re worried. Your mind is racing 24/7 and Paw Patrol is playing on an endless loop in the background while you try to work from home.
How can you not be anxious? It’s normal. Especially right now.
But, here’s the thing I want you to understand – that anxiety can equal rage.
I know that because that’s what happens for me.
Women in general have a lot on their plates, but throw in a pandemic and homeschooling, and zero grandparents or friends to send your kids to, and women have the right to be mad. Angry, even.
Now, I’m not advocating for taking this out on our kids. I’m advocating for acknowledging that we need a little extra help and grace right now.
We need help from our fellow mamas and we can get that by being honest about what we’re feeling.
We need help from our partners that might need someone to say – HEY! I’m drowning here.
We need help from society to give us some damn grace and let us know it’s OK to fall apart. And gasp – be a little pissed off at everything that’s going on around us right now.
Moms want nothing more than a safe, and happy, and peaceful world for their babies.
And to be honest? 2020 doesn’t feel much like that right now.
If you’re feeling extra angry and you can’t figure out why – replace that word angry with anxious. Ask yourself if that’s really it. And if it is? Tell someone. Your mental health right now matters. And it’s possible to get help. Whether it be through medication, therapy, or just telling a well-trusted friend.
You’re still a good mama if you’re angry.
And, we get it – there’s plenty to be angry about right now.