Perfection Pending

Stories of Perfectly Real Moms

Chandler Childhood In the Motherhood Manic Mondays Motherhood Parenting

The REAL Reason Having Children is So Expensive

My house is frequently full of kids these days. I was breaking up some rowdy boys that were being a little too crazy in my tiny living room the other day. Just as I uttered the words, “OK! Everybody outside if you’re going to be this crazy!” I turned my back and my two year old picks up his Thomas the train toy and throws it at our living room window like a major league pitcher.

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I sent home every neighborhood child immediately so they didn’t see my epic freak out that I just knew was coming. The Nolan Ryan wannabe (sorry my baseball knowledge is limited) was sent to time out, and I managed to not scream and yell. I gave him a stern “No! No!” and a good talking to afterward about throwing things. He cried. I didn’t. So, I guess, considering the circumstances, we all did pretty good. In a matter of seconds, this boy managed to cause about $400 in damage to the main window of the front of my house. It isn’t the diapers, and the food, and the clothes that are expensive. It’s the fact that they are inherently destructive. That’s why children make parents very, very poor.

Now I understand why my mom was so angry after my brother tried to show off his strength to his little sisters by lifting our coffee table up on its side causing the glass to fall out and break.

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Good thing I shared a free printable quote yesterday about being thankful for our circumstances instead of trying to count the “things” we are grateful for. I’m going to recite that quote in my head every time I look at my broken window this week.

But, the thing that kills me? He doesn’t seem too ashamed of his handy work. Little stinker. Is it too early to make him get a job?

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 Perfection Pending

Comments

  1. Let's see, so far I have to replace 2 cups, a bowl, 3 plates, a vase and a night light. Thankfully no broken windows or glass doors/tables... yet!
    Reply

  2. I think you did very well not to explode! It is so frustrating when kids do not understand the cost of their actions. One of my boys used to go way over the top if any of his possessions were damaged, yet showed little respect for things I valued. It was hard to stay calm and reasonable, especially when he did not seem sorry for his actions and tried to justify what he did. Hopefully your little man did not intend to break the window, not that this helps with the hefty bill.
    Reply

    • Yeah. I definitely don't think he even realized what would happen. 2 years old is hard to grasp that concept! It was just a matter of time before he did something like this. He practically came out of the womb throwing things. I think he will be a pitcher some day. For real.
      Reply

  3. You seem to have done an amazing job keeping your calm with him. I don't know if I would have been able to keep my cool so well! It's so true though. My boys have destroyed more toys than I can even remember, just from being rough and not playing with them like they're supposed to. I even found a perfectly drawn "S" on my car door from one of them trying to spell their name with some kind of sharp object. Grrr!!! I'm glad you were able to keep perspective and even snap a pic--so good for the soul not to get too angry:)
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    • Well, the pic happened several days after the fact. I didn't want him to think I was rewarding him for bad behavior by posing him next to the evidence. Although, seeing the picture, he probably thought that anyway!
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  4. Super impressed at your ability to remain calm. My son is still a bit young and hence isn't TOO destructive (unless you count the couch fabric being totally ruined by spit up), but I know it's coming...my bank account better get ready!
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  6. Believe or not, I have three kids and all they've really managed to destroy are the blinds on the windows. We even got our full deposit back from our previous apartment where my 7 year old and 16 month old were living. Hopefully I don't jinx myself by saying this because my son is not two yet!
    Reply

  8. So happy to have found you Meredith! I too have disembarked the "crazy train" called parenting perfection! I'd add your button to my site but I can't figure out how to do it (lol!) One of my sons left his mark on the paint job of our mini-van. With magnet in hand, he left a 360 degree scratch around the van's circumference. I've lived with the scratch for the past five years - which is five years less than the stretch marks he gave me!
    Reply

    • I'm happy you found me too!! Ummm…I dread the day my kids try to draw on the car. They already climb on the roof when I'm not around!! Kids are SO crazy! Thanks for stopping by!
      Reply

  9. Oh my goodness! I'm always worried for our windows...we have a lot of flying trains in our house :-/ What a perfect Manic Monday post though, so...silver lining. We spent the day in the ER yesterday with my three year old with an infected dog bite on his hand. So I have a pretty good Manic Monday post brewing it my head right now. Hopefully I'll have the energy to get it written down tonight!
    Reply

  10. I'm so sorry about your window, but your little guy is adorable! I feel your pain. Today we replaced our horrible, embarrassing, ugly, destroyed-by-our-children couch and love seat with 2 new leather couches. We hope that the leather will hold up better to puke, pee, and all other disgusting body fluids. We also bought the protection plan for once!
    Reply

  11. That photo is really quite ... awesome? It's like the evil genius "Yeah ... But I'm cute, right? So what's the issue?" photo. You were very amazing to not completely lose it. I suspect I would have....
    Reply

    • well, you can be just as much of a scary mommy in a quiet way as you can when you yell. So, I'm not sure we should be handing out the mother of the year award either. ;)
      Reply

  12. Yikes - $400! Thankfully I have a son but he's nowhere near destructive probably because he's an only-child and even his cousins are calm. Lol. He loves his video games, otherwise it's soccer and that's an outdoorsy activity. :D So far, no damage but we still have a long way to go considering he's barely 7. Happy Monday Meredith! -Iva
    Reply

  13. People in glass houses, right? Ha! I was listening to This American Life on NPR last week and there was a conversation about how "good kids go bad" called Bad Baby. They suggested the opposite- that inherent in a a toddling child is a sort of narcissistic mayhem (they may have used the word sociopath.) Not so much empathy and loads of impulses running wild. Now your little stinker seems way sweeter than the tumbling toddlers to which they referred (wink, wink) but the good news is, they gain that empathy from us as they grow! So good job not yelling (I would have!) Hee hee.
    Reply

    • Haha! I believe that. Nacissistic mayhem describes my 2 year old perfectly! It's kind of nice to think that we actually teach them things that they learn too! :)
      Reply

  14. This post makes me laugh and oddly, gives me some comfort! My 16 year old son just got in his first, and hopefully last, fender bender. They can be expensive and causing destruction at any age! :)
    Reply

  15. Nooooo! I am so sorry about the window. However, have to say that is an adorable picture of your son looking at it. Reminds me of the time my brother was telling us about a movie he'd recently watched. We were sitting around the dining room table and he reached up to grab the chandelier jobby above the table. "So the actor grabbed the light like this and ...." as he said it my brother grabbed the light right out of the ceiling. I'll never forget my dad's face as the subsequent ball of fire shot directly at him. Yes, that was one expensive dinner at home that night ...
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    • Ha! Oh my gosh. Well, it happens to all of us, I guess. Although, found out today that our bill is looking more like $700. Geez. Windows are expensive!
      Reply

  16. Oh boy. I'm pretty sure the couch will be the first fatality. Between the smears of sticky fingers, boogers, and its use as a gymnastics mat, I don't know how long it'll last. Maybe I'll just replace it with an actual gymnastics mat.
    Reply

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