My birthday is this month, so I’m celebrating my upcoming 41st birthday by daydreaming about the birthday party of my dreams. What would it be? What would I do? Who would come? More importantly, what would we do. And, then it struck me moms need a theme for their birthday too. You know, like power rangers or harry potter? But, for moms.
What should my party theme be?
Here are my top five birthday party themes for moms.
Napping Birthday Party Theme
Moms would gather and everyone would get their own napping pad and noise cancelling headphones. We would speak in whispers, no loud shrieking allowed. We would all lay out our napping pads, and put on our noise cancelling head phones and pull down the black out shades. The crowning moment of the party would be that we would sleep for however long we freaking wanted. Party favors would include: eye masks, soft blankets, and the noise cancelling headphones of course.
Target Birthday Party Theme
For this birthday, we’d all go to Target and just wander around. In my fantasy world, kids would not be allowed in Target on this day and we’d be able to stroll the aisles without hearing a kid throwing a temper tantrum in the distance. For a day, we’d all be Joanna Gaines picking out a new throw pillow or lampshade for our mom cave back at home, and we’d have a Starbucks or Diet Coke in hand while we laughed with our friends, bought cactus shaped earring holders, and had a grab as many items as you can from the $1 aisle contest.
No Responsibility Party Theme
In this fantasy birthday party theme idea, there are a few rules. No one can ask you for anything. Especially while you try to eat, pee, or sleep. Phrases like “t0-do list” and “did you pick up cat food at the store?” are banned, and no one can speak their children’s names. You pretend, for the entire day that you are a single woman with absolutely zero responsibilities. Party favors include a one way ticket to a deserted island where no one has to ask for snacks and you get to eat your food while it’s still warm.
Mindless Social Media Scrolling/Meme Sharing Party
To this party, you’d invite all your friends, and sit around mindlessly scrolling social media, and sharing memes. No one would make you get off the couch to do something productive like pour them a glass of milk when they are full capable themselves.
No one would shame you for not watching your kids twirl in their skirt, and you’d be surprised how much fun it is to watch people tripping into a kiddie pool in their backyard without the hassle of kids interrupting you or having to tag your friends. Simply lean over, watch your favorite stupid online video together and laugh until you’re crying. Party favors would include an instagram filter you would never pay money for that magically makes you not look tired.
Slumber Party Theme For Moms
Slumber parties were fun when you were a little girl but they can be even more fun as an adult. No bras are allowed, and no one cares if your sweats have a hole in the crotch. Bring your favorite chick flick and adult beverage and pass out in your own separate beds (because we’re too dang old to sleep on the floor anymore) at 10PM without anyone trying to rub your arm for a little action at midnight. Make sure to bring your favorite face mask too, but sleep with your make-up on anyway because you’re TIRED.
In the morning, you will awaken when your body feels ready to wake up. Not by a toddler playing the ground is lava game with his siblings right outside your bedroom door.
I’m starting to think this themed birthday party for moms is a great idea. And, that I need to request one of these parties, stat. No one can be invited that will require you to clean your house, or judge you for the fact that they find a half eaten hot dog behind your couch.
And of course, at every party idea there would be a never ending supply of cake, that couldn’t make you fat, and no one asking for a bite.
Meredith Ethington is a writer and a mom to three, trying to help her kids understand sarcasm and her need for personal space. Meredith’s debut parenting book, Mom Life: Perfection Pending, provides an uplifting yet realistic look at all that is expected of moms in the 21st century and is now available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and at Absolute Love Publishing. She proudly writes for many of her favorite parenting sites, including Scary Mommy, Babble, Momtastic, and on her own blog. Follow her on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter where she loves to laugh at herself and admit that while parenting is the best thing ever, it’s also the hardest job on earth.