Perfection Pending

By Meredith Ethington

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Humor Mom Life Parenting

The Real Mom’s Guide To Getting Organized

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As much as I’d like to admit that I’m a crazy organized person, there is a closet or ten in my house that proves otherwise. In addition to those closets, there are piles of paper on literally every surface, and a cabinet full of scrapbooking supplies I never use. Getting organized is something I’d like to do… one day. When I’m not too busy using humor to cope. Or making sarcastically awesome pins. You’re welcome.

The Real Mom’s Guide To Getting Organized

I want to be organized. I really, REALLY do. But, real moms forget their kids at school. Not me, of course, other real moms. Real moms also forget that it’s career day at preschool, and run around in a hot mess of frazzled scrambling at the last minute.

So, I thought I’d share my “guide” to getting your life organized. Maybe it will work for you, or maybe you’ll never listen to a thing I have to say ever again. No hard feelings.

  1. Make sure you have a place for everything and that everything has a place. Do this by threatening on a regular basis to donate all their toys to children who help their mothers clean the bathrooms. Have a backup place for everything like the dining room table, kitchen counters, or the middle of the living room floor. Teach your kids to put their backpacks on the hook you hung in your mudroom from that cute Pinterest tutorial, and watch as they throw them on the couch every single day after school.
  2. Meal Plan. Pin all pretty recipes on Pinterest. Make a menu plan that includes herb crusted tilapia and teriyaki rice noodle bowls with ginger aioli. Buy all the groceries. For four days in a row, fix hot dogs, cereal, mac and cheese, and chicken nuggets for dinner. Finally mustered up the energy to cook a real meal and realize all your expensive ingredients have now turned to rotted mush in the bottom drawer of your fridge. Order Pizza.
  3. Follow a routine. Get everyone an alarm clock. Trust your seven-year-old to set it before school the next day, and then jolt awake at midnight when it goes off on full blast, static mode. Get your kids to bed earlier by letting them fall asleep in the car on the way home from the pizza place, and carefully lay them in the bed fully clothed. Be surprised when they wake up at 4 am wanting to play the kazoo next to your head because they went to bed at 5 pm the night before.
  4. Clean out closets and bedrooms regularly. Deal with the clutter for 364 days of the year by swearing under your breath every time you have to get something out of a closet or open your child’s bedroom door. Build up a foot immunity to legos since they are constantly not in their freaking place, and shove them to the side to clear a path when you need to go into the playroom. On the 365th day, when your kids are at school, clean out literally every single toy bin and purge half their toys. Put them in your car for a month so your kids can find them and cry that you are donating their very most favorite toy in the entire world.
  5. Organize Papers. Kids create a lot of paperwork, so create an elaborate file folder by school grade year complete with your child’s picture on each file folder so that you can keep things organized. Never put anything in it. Instead, leave papers on your kitchen counter until your three-year-old knocks his drink over and ruins half of it. Quickly act like you are sad that you have to throw it away. Take the rest to a safe resting place in another room until you can throw it away later. Avoid eye contact when your child asks where his certificate from the science fair went.
  6. Keep Your Car Clean. Do this by yelling at everyone to carry everything in every time you get home. A week later, notice a horrifying smell, and realize they did not listen to your advice. Pay lots of money to get your car professionally detailed and swear they can never eat or drink in the car again. As soon as someone cries, hand food or drinks back to them. Get faint whiffs of the rotting milk your child left in the back seat until you sell your car.
  7. Get a planner. Try for a while to keep things on your phone, but realize that you haven’t been getting your alerts since you never do the updates. Forget important dates and events and apologize to your children weekly. Accept that you’re a hot mess mom and probably always will be. Finally, get a planner to get your life organized. Carry it with you everywhere. No seriously, you really need to do this one.

This post contains affiliate links. See my full disclosure here.

To stop the madness of trying to keep my life organized and always failing, I’m trying something new this year. I got myself an Erin Condren planner and I’m in love. I’ve never used a paper planner. Have you ever had one? It’s BEAUTIFUL and I’m excited to organize my life as a mom and my life as a blogger and freelance writer. I desperately need this.

When I got my package of goodies, I may have squealed and swatted my ten year old’s hand away as she attempted to grab my brand new dual tip markers. There is something about pretty post it notes and planners that really speak to my Virgo personality.

The best part is that you can use my affiliate link to get $10 off an order. And, this thing is worth every penny so far. I’m working on getting this month all planned out life wise and bblog-wise and I’m dying about how beautiful it is! I love how you can customize so many things right down to the color of the coils. Now I can see what all the hype is about.

Grab yours here, and let me know if you LOVE it as much as I do.

More on Getting Organized:

Legit ways to get organized:

  • Your Ultimate Guide To Getting Organized
  • Chore Zones: A Way to get LITTLE kids to clean up their BIG messes

My Must-Have Getting Organized Resources:

  • My new favorite planner with extras
  • All of my favorite products on Amazon

You’ll Also Love:

  • A Real Mom’s Guide to A Clean House – one of my most popular viral posts!
  • A Real Mom’s Top 10 Reasons to Get Takeout Tonight
  • 13 Memes That Perfectly Describe the Struggle To Keep Your House Clean When You Have Kids
  • How to Clean for House Guests (A Practical Guide)

Like this? Be sure to Pin it – and share it with another mom who could use a good laugh – or a great planner!


8 Comments

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Comments

  1. Tracey says

    March 7, 2017 at 6:39 am

    What a beautiful planner!! I admit to struggling with meal planning. I know that it will make my week easier, but I dread taking the time to sit down and do it – though I appreciate it all throughout the week when I’m not struggling at 5pm with what to make for supper!

    Reply
  2. Natalie says

    March 11, 2017 at 8:29 am

    Thank you! I have been reading through your blog and facebook page and laughing my head off! I am so thankful for real people like you! You are awesome!

    Reply
  3. Meredith Gallie says

    July 18, 2017 at 1:33 pm

    This is great. I am a SAHM of 4 boys. I vlog about it on my youtube channel “Surviving As Mom”. Thank you for sharing.

    Reply
  4. Sara says

    October 3, 2017 at 7:35 pm

    Omg ???????? I love this post lol you’re hilarious

    Reply
  5. Meg Miller says

    January 3, 2018 at 2:49 pm

    I love my EC planner! I’m getting ready for the transition to being a full-time mom and its daunting for sure! I’m going to have to try to find my schedule and what works for our day. Great tips. My car is never clean and I really have to work on that….

    Reply
  6. Chantelle says

    August 23, 2018 at 7:37 am

    Oh my god this is so on point ???? buy all the fancy groceries and then cook hot dogs! Thanks for the funny read, and this planner is freaking gorgeous! I want one!!

    But my kid would probably steal it and rip the pages out ????

    Reply

Trackbacks

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Welcome! I’m Meredith.

Mom. Writer. Diet Coke connoisseur. Born and raised Texan. Lover of real talk and laughter with a hint of sarcasm mixed in.

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Meredith Ethington

perfectpending

Mom • Author • Mental Health Therapist In Training
Grab my new book, The Mother Load, available now. 👇👇

Night night! 😤 Night night! 😤
If you missed my last post about how raising teens If you missed my last post about how raising teens can wreck you mentally….wellll this is part of the reason why. So lonely! But we are in this together somehow. 😂 Make sure to check out my latest substack and grab a copy of my book —- The Mother Load!
NEW ---> "When there are problems in these big kid NEW ---> "When there are problems in these big kid years, it’s no longer really acceptable to call a friend and air the annoyances of the situation. At least not the specifics.

Sure, you can commiserate with a fellow parent about teenagers being the worst.

But, to be honest - they’re not the worst. They’re kind of amazing. But their problems make me tired to my core." 

Read the latest on my substack. I promise you'll relate. ❤️
So sweet. ❤️ Follow me @perfectpending and bet So sweet. ❤️
Follow me @perfectpending and better yet buy my book or subscribe to my substack to support me.
"I don’t know about you, but I don’t really wa "I don’t know about you, but I don’t really want same-ness anymore. I want messy. I want admissions that shit is hard and we don’t have it all together. I want to have a makeup free, messy bun in my sweats run in with a mom friend and not feel worried she’s checking out my un-groomed eyebrows.

I don’t want to try to give off this illusion that I’m control of my life any better than the next person. It’s a shitshow for all of us, and we continue to hide it for fear of what? Being human?"

Read the rest on my Substack. Link in profile.
WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I WHAT IF THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I’LL EVER BE AND I MISS IT? What if I miss the best time of my life. What if it’s right this second?
What if it’s right now while I’m in finals week of grad school, and have a kid that’s sick? 
I already miss so much. The gummy smiles of babes without any teeth. The squeaky voices of 2 year olds. The babbling of a baby that’s just trying so hard to say mama. The grammar mistakes my kids make when they’re talking that I don’t have the heart to correct because I love it too much. 

I miss a lot about those younger years that have already slipped away. My youngest is sick, much like in this picture, but he is too big to snuggle in my arms now when he’s running a fever. 

Today I had the thought, what if this is it? What if this IS the happiest I’ll ever be?
For a moment, I lingered in that thought as I stood over my sink and did the dishes. I started to cry.
Am I missing it? AM I? I felt a tug that maybe I was. Maybe I wasn’t relishing enough, and enjoying enough, and being present enough.
But, then I realized, it will never be ENOUGH. 

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New year, same me. 😂 #mentalhealth #anxiety #de New year, same me. 😂
#mentalhealth #anxiety #depression
"I don't care" as I literally care about every sin "I don't care" as I literally care about every single thing.
I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of th I’ve got to admit - I’m kind of over all of this. *sweeps arm generally at planet earth*

Look, I’ve never been a half glass full kind of gal. I can ALWAYS find the negative in every situation. 

But, right now it’s easy to say that I’m over it. It being.....

The state of our economy. Social media. People being unemployed. People being racist and homophobic. The debate over politics. People judging people. ALLLLLL of it. 

Everything is crap right now. We joke about it a lot. We have to in order to survive. 

It’s the one millionth day of January but Spring feels so far away. 

I’m over these four damn walls that we call home. 

Yeah, I know. Even as I’m typing this it all sounds like a bunch of ungrateful whiney BS. I hear it. I don’t need you to point it out, Karen. 

But, my guess is you’re reading this right now and realizing you’re over it too. Whatever “it” is in your life.

Some days the world feels like total crap. Everything is a mess. Everything costs too much. For E-V-E-R-Y-B-O-D-Y. 

Yes, even for you Karen. ➡️➡️ to keep reading.
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But, the loss of yourself in motherhood is real. And It’s not talked about enough." 

Do you feel like you lost yourself in motherhood? How? I really want to know. 

Psss - I am in grad school to become a therapist, and am not ashamed to ask that you subscribe to my paid substack. I just lowered the cost to $36/year! That's like $4/month and you'll have access to all my previous posts, and some new weekly short posts to give you ideas to help with balancing motherhood and your own mental health. I'm learning a lot in school, and will only continue to do so, so subscribe and we'll support each other. ❤️
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Found in my pediatricians office. 🤣 What’s th Found in my pediatricians office. 🤣 What’s the moral of the story friends? If you think your household is always sick - it’s because they probably are. Kids make everything more germ-y
Here’s what I do know 👇 No one knows what th Here’s what I do know 👇

No one knows what they’re doing. 
We all feel like imposters. 
Our kids love us anyway. 
We’re all going to be OK. 
You’ve got this (as much as any of us do) 😘

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